Making a Non-Verbal Oath in the Heart

Question: I am 15 years old and addicted to masturbation. l tried before many times to stop but I failed. A week ago I was so disappointed because I swore in my heart not to masturbate again. I now think this is a very terrible decision because in the near future I might do it and forget or be very unconscious of myself. What if I break this oath? I don’t want to fast three days because my parents will find it suspicious, I don’t know what to do.

Answer:

Assalamu alaykum,

I am very sorry that you are addicted to such a sin at this young age, but you absolutely are capable of breaking this habit. Please consult this website which is a safe place of healing for Muslims:
https://purifyyourgaze.com/

The best advice that I can give you for overcoming masturbation is in these links:
https://seekersguidance.org/answers/general-counsel/is-masturbation-sinful-how-do-i-stop/
https://seekersguidance.org/answers/general-counsel/what-can-i-do-to-stop-masturbating/

As for your oath, because you thought it in your heart, it is certainly not binding. Please refrain from making such oaths out loud in the future because one must beat addiction through therapy and healing, and not through rash ultimatums. This is just a nasty trick of the Shaytan.
https://seekersguidance.org/answers/hanafi-fiqh/words-makes-oath-binding/

May Allah help you through this,  give you immense tawfiq in your endeavour, and make you a means to help others.

[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad

Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria for two years where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, tafseer, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her Masters in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She recently moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.