Can a Man Pray Without Socks in the Shafi’i School?

/in , /by

Assalamu alaykum,

Thank you for your question.

It is permissible and valid to pray without socks in our school for men instead of women.

Clothing one’s nakedness is a necessary condition for the validity of the prayer (0: when one is able).[…] The nakedness of a man (0: man meaning the female counterpart, including young boys, even if not yet of the age of discrimination) consists of the area between the navel and knees. [f5.2-5.3, The Reliance of the Traveller]

See more details of nakedness (`awra) here:
https://seekersguidance.org/answers/shafii-fiqh/male-dress-code-according-shafii-school/
https://seekersguidance.org/answers/general-counsel/covering-nakedness-while-swimming/
https://seekersguidance.org/answers/hanafi-fiqh/is-the-knee-cap-included-in-the-minimum-nakedness/

May Allah give you the best of this world and the next.
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad

Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria, for two years, where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, Tafseer, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her Master’s in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan, where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She recently moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.

 

How Can I Kindly Ask My Husband To Get His Sagging Skin Removed so That He Becomes More Attractive?

/in , /by

Question: I love my husband but I find his body unattractive. Before marriage, he lost a lot of weight and got sagging skin. He got surgery to remove it from his abdomen, but not his back, so he has loose skin there. He gained some weight back, so now it looks loose and bulgy at the same time. I didn’t notice this before marriage because we didn’t spend much time together and the clothes he wore didn’t show it. I’m really anxious and want to ask him to get it removed. How do I go about this?

Answer:

Assalamu alaykum,
Thank you for your question.

Physical attraction

The point that you bring up is important. A man should care to take of his hygiene and his body for the sake of his wife. Even though physical attraction is not everything in a marriage, it is still important. Hopefully, you are keeping up your end of exercising, dressing up, smelling nice, and eating healthy as well. Now, how do you tell him?

Tact

You know your husband the best, and you know how he will react to you. If he is the type who appreciates you sitting down and talking to him about it at length, do that. If he is the type who better appreciates a simple comment like, “I know of a good doctor who is better than your last one“ or “I want to start keto, do you want to do it with me?“try that. Usually, a short comment will spark a train of thought, which will eventually spark action by the grace of Allah. Here are some general tips:

Tips

-Ask Allah to help you speak to him and ask Him to bless you and your family with health, strength, and devotion to Him.
-Choose good timing. When he is relaxed, not stressed out, not in the middle of work, not while he is eating or hungry, but when he is relaxed and has free time.
-Speak respectfully. Always treat another as you want to be treated yourself; as the Prophet told us, may Allah bless him and grant him peace.
-Be honest and use positive words, not an accusatory tone.
-Motivate him by cooking healthy meals and not buying sweets. Make healthy desserts. You control most of what goes in his stomach!
-Don’t try to control his eating habits or force him to exercise. It must come from within him, and pressuring him will only cause resentment.
-Also, pray istikhara about the surgery. Istikhara should always be employed for big decisions like this and followed sincerely.
-Take steps yourself to get rid of your anxiety regarding this. I don’t want you to stress and lose sleep over it. Focus on his good points and do your best, and leave it in Allah’s hands.

May Allah give you the best of this world and the next.

https://seekersguidance.org/answers/general-counsel/how-important-is-physical-attraction-in-marriage/

[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad

 

Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria for two years where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, Tafseer, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her Master’s in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan, where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She recently moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.

Legitimate Reasons to Speak Bad of Others

/in , /by

Question: Is complaining of being wronged to someone who cannot help one at all considered backbiting?

Answer:

Wa alaykum assalam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,

Dear questioner,

Thank you for your important question.

Speaking bad of an individual to someone who cannot help one either stop that individual wronging him or help him personally deal with the problem is backbiting (ghiba) and is sinful.

For example, your manager said something offensive to you, so you tell everyone you know what he/she said. Does everyone you know need to know that? Is it essential that they all know that for this wrong to set aright? No, therefore, it is sinful.

However, if one brought it up with two people, both of whom may offer advice on how to deal with it, it is not backbiting.

(One should also conceal the person’s identity one is speaking badly about as much as practically possible. If the person whose help or advice you are seeking doesn’t need to know who this person is, they shouldn’t know.)

Importantly, there is a qualitative difference between ranting and trying to solve a problem. Ranting is done out of vengeance and anger, whereas trying to solve a problem is done to protect oneself or someone else, or (ideally) purely for the sake of Allah.

Ranting about an individual is sinful and constitutes backbiting. Trying to solve a problem is part of commanding the right and forbidding the wrong. The two, unfortunately, can easily become mixed. May Allah forgive us all!

Please see:
https://seekersguidance.org/articles/saving-our-souls-series-part-7-38-sins-of-the-tongue-shaykh-yusuf-weltch/
https://seekersguidance.org/show/31-content-of-character/
https://seekersguidance.org/courses/upright-speech-birgivi-on-holding-ones-tongue/
https://seekersguidance.org/articles/prophet-muhammad/imam-ghazali-guarding-tongue/

I pray this helps.

[Ustadh] Farid

Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Ustadh Farid Dingle has completed extensive years of study in the sciences of the Arabic language and the various Islamic Sciences. During his studies, he also earned a CIFE Certificate in Islamic Finance. Over the years, he has developed a masterful ability to craft lessons that help non-Arabic speakers gain a deep understanding of the language. He currently teaches courses in the Arabic Language.

 Could I have broken my mother’s marriage by touching her?

/in , , /by

Question:  I read about hurmat musahara. Now I need clarification. If you touch your mother with lust, her marriage will break. But does this also count if you have a lust for someone else whilst you are touching here? Or if you get a random erection (which may happen any time without any certain reason) whilst you contact here? But it is not due to here? I never would think of my mother this way; it’s literally disgusting for me to even think about it. But since I read this, I got waswasa about it.

Answer:

In the name of Allah, Most Compassionate, Most Merciful,

Assalam’aleykum, I pray this finds you in the best of states.

No, in the scenario you have described, your mother’s marriage won’t be broken, even according to the Hanafi school. [Lubab]

Hanafi jurists define the lust you have talked about as getting an erection because of the touching or, if an erection was already there, as having an increase of this erection. [Lubab]

None of this is present in your description. Lust as a feeling is not considered except for impotent or very old men. [Lubab]

More details on this ruling

Hurmat al-musahara is the non-marriageable kinship (mahramiya) created between a person and his spouse’s relatives due to marriage and valid intercourse. Thus, a man who marries a woman and consummates the marriage cannot marry her mother or any daughter from a previous marriage. Similarly, a person cannot marry the wife of his father. The Qur’anic verse affirming the basic idea of hurmat al-musahara is, “Do not marry those [women] whom your fathers married.” (Sura al-Nisa 4:22)

Outside of a marriage context, however, the scholars differ on whether hurmat al-musahara is ever established. In other words, does adultery–fornication or touching–kissing outside of a marriage relationship establish this hurma? The Hanafis say it does (adding specific conditions for touching/kissing), while the Malikis and Shafi‘is say it does not. In other words, if a father-in-law touched his daughter-in-law directly with lust, the marriage between the former’s son and the daughter-in-law would be broken according to Hanafis but not so according to the Malikis or Shafi‘is. [Ibn Abidin, Radd al-Muhtar; al-Shirbini, Mughni al-Muhtaj; al-Dasuqi, Hashiya]

Please see: https://seekersguidance.org/answers/hanafi-fiqh/father-law-kissed-daughter-law/

And Allah knows best.

Wassalam

[Ustadh] Sufyan Qufi

Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

How Can I Get Rid of Thoughts of Being With the Same Gender When the Opposite Gender Has Always Harmed Me?

/in , /by
Question: I’m a teenage girl, and I keep thinking about having a sexual relationship with a woman, and I know it’s haram but are the thoughts haram? I have a fear of men since I was little; every man in my life has given me a bad experience and taken advantage of me even though they’re my family. I get PTSD when I think of men.

Answer:

Assalamu alaykum,

Thank you for your question.  I am so sorry for your pain and suffering, and I pray that you can rid yourself of this great sense of hurt and confusion when it comes to the opposite gender.

Victim

Please understand that you have been a victim, and you are stronger than you think you are. You are better than the people who abused you, and they will be called to a grievous account on Doomsday. Your best step forward is to heal, turn to Allah, increase your knowledge, and have constant remembrance (dhikr) of Him. Contact
a therapist or counselor to help you spell out your emotions and grow from them.

Ask Allah what you need because a victim’s supplications are always heard and answered by Allah’s promise. The Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, “’Beware of the supplication of the oppressed; for indeed there is no barrier between it and Allah.“ [Tirmidhi]

Same-gender

Your thoughts about the same gender are understandable as some research has shown that one’s sexual orientation is affected by being abused as a child. However, I am afraid you cannot continue with these thoughts. Continuous thoughts like this that you don’t discard immediately are usually the first steps to resolve, intention, and sinful action. Please see the details being accountable for thoughts here:
https://seekersguidance.org/answers/general-counsel/are-we-held-accountable-for-mere-thoughts-of-sinning-if-we-dont-act-on-our-thoughts/

Ask Allah

Once again, I ask that you contact a therapist or counselor or a mental health expert where you can speak freely and discuss the problem. Although there are many virtuous and pious men out there, I can’t convince you to trust men again unless it comes from your own healed heart. Ask Allah to guide you to the right resources and help you find a way out of this confusion and pain. I am certain that He will send you help and support. May Allah give you the best of this world and the next.

https://seekersguidance.org/answers/repentance/sorrow-over-sexual-misdeeds/

[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad

Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria, for two years, where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, Tafseer, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her Master’s in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan, where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She recently moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.

Was My Nikah Performed Over Text Message for Fun Valid?

/in , , /by

Question: I used to talk to a boy over text messages. We (unintentionally in fun) asked each other whether I accepted a nikah to him. This situation took place over text message, and we both agreed to do it as a joke. He asked me, “Do you accept me in nikah with the haq mehr of your choice?” to which I said yes. I want to know if this was the nikah is valid. Note that there were no witnesses on my side, nor did I have the permission of my wali.

Answer:

Assalamu alaykum,

Thank you for your question. Your nikah as such was not valid, but I highly recommend that you cease this kind of behavior with boys who are not your mahram. Delete that message as this is no laughing matter.

Take into consideration the seriousness of a nikah by these Prophetic words. “There are three matters in which seriousness is serious and joking is serious: marriage, divorce, and taking back (one’s wife).“ [Ibn Majah]

As such, if two male witnesses had been privy to the messages, you could have been married, sinful, and then would have to annul the marriage and explain all this to your parents and future spouse.

May Allah give you the best of this world and the next.
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad

Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria, for two years, where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, Tafseer, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her Master’s in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan, where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She recently moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.

Hijri Calendar and the Seasons

/in , /by

Question: Was the Hijri calendar originally in synchrony with the four seasons? Is Ramadan supposed to be fasted in the Spring?

Answer:

Wa alaykum assalam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,

Dear questioner,

Thank you for your important question.

While there is evidence that certain pre-Islamic Arab communities adjusted and aligned the lunar calendar with the four seasons utilizing a system of intercalation, it is not fair to state that all pre-Islamic Arab communities did that.

Furthermore, to assume that this practice happened during the Medinan period of the  Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) when all the details of Islamic law and Islamic rituals were established is incorrect. This is clearly evinced by comparing clear and well-documented historical dates such as the Covenant with the Christians of the World and the Covenant with the Jews of Khaybar and Maqna with Jewish and Christian calendars.

For a full discussion on this topic, please see:
On the Origins of the Hijrī Calendar, Ibrahim Zein and Ahmed El-Wakil
Mémoire sur le calendrier arabe avant l’islamisme, Mahmoud Effendi

We have to understand that Allah has preserved this religion. Allah has made sure that scholars have been there to preserve the religion in its pristine form and solve new confusions that the Muslims face in every generation. When all the scholars of jurisprudence agree that the lunar calendar is the basis of the Islamic calendar, despite their very desperate and variegated research methods and conclusions, we know as a fact that this is what Allah wants us to do. Revisionist ideas on issues that are agreed upon are not welcome.

The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said, ‘There will always be a group of my nation who will keep to the way of Allah unharmed by those who try to trick them or work against them until Allah’s command comes while they are in power.’ (Muslim)

Revisionists posit that the Sunna was lost a long time ago and that everyone has been wrong for centuries. This is completely against the teachings of the Qur’an and Sunna.

Please also see:
https://seekersguidance.org/answers/islamic-belief/is-it-necessary-to-act-upon-the-consensus-of-the-sahaba/

I pray this helps.

[Ustadh] Farid

 

Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Ustadh Farid Dingle has completed extensive years of study in the sciences of the Arabic language and the various Islamic Sciences. During his studies, he also earned a CIFE Certificate in Islamic Finance. Over the years, he has developed a masterful ability to craft lessons that help non-Arabic speakers gain a deep understanding of the language. He currently teaches courses in the Arabic Language.

 

 

Is it permissible for Muslim women to wear makeup? If so, when is it allowed? What does Islam say about makeup?

/in , , /by

Question Summary

Is it permissible for Muslim women to wear makeup? If so, when is it allowed? What does Islam say about makeup?

Question Answer

In the Name of Allah, the Most Merciful and Compassionate

It is permissible for a Muslim woman to wear makeup. In fact, in some circumstances, she may be rewarded for doing so. This ruling applies in the following circumstances:

1) Adorning Herself Privately, Not Publically

It is permissible and rewarding for a woman to adorn herself with her spouse. The inverse is also true. It is also permissible for her to adorn herself in a gathering where no non-mahram (marriageable) men are present.

2) The Makeup Does Not Prevent the Validity of Her Wudu/Ghusl

Some makeup acts as a preventative barrier for water in the washing of the wudu/ghusl. This is still within the bounds of permissibility when a woman cannot pray or remove the makeup before the next wudu/ghusl for prayer.

What is Prohibited?

It is prohibited for a woman to wear makeup that is customarily used to beautify herself if done in public or the presence of non-mahram men.

Anti-aging products and makeup meant solely to conceal flaws are not necessarily prohibited because they are not customarily used for beautification, rather a concealment. However, caution dictates that a Muslim woman should still avoid this type of makeup when going in public or before non-mahram men.

Allah Most High commands Muslim women saying, “Settle in your homes, and do not display yourselves as women did in the days of ˹pre-Islamic˺ ignorance. Establish prayer, pay alms-tax, and obey Allah and His Messenger. Allah only intends to keep ˹the causes of˺ evil away from you and purify you completely, O  members of the ˹Prophet’s˺ family!” [Qur’an; 33:33]

In pre-Islamic Arabia (known as the time of ignorance), women would adorn themselves with makeup and perfume in public and act flirtatiously and/or seductively before the opposite gender. This is prohibited and forbidden directly by the Qur’an and Prophetic teachings.

Hope this helps
Allah knows best
[Shaykh] Yusuf Weltch

Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Shaykh Yusuf Weltch is a teacher of Arabic, Islamic law, and spirituality. After accepting Islam in 2008, he then completed four years at the Darul Uloom seminary in New York, where he studied Arabic and the traditional sciences. He then traveled to Tarim, Yemen, where he stayed for three years studying in Dar Al-Mustafa under some of the greatest scholars of our time, including Habib Umar Bin Hafiz, Habib Kadhim al-Saqqaf, and Shaykh Umar al-Khatib. In Tarim, Shaykh Yusuf completed the memorization of the Qur’an and studied beliefs, legal methodology, hadith methodology, Quranic exegesis, Islamic history, and some texts on spirituality. He joined the SeekersGuidance faculty in the summer of 2019.

Please clarify the seemingly contradictory answers . How are one’s prayers accepted by Allah Most High?

/in , /by

Question Summary

Please clarify the seemingly contradictory answers. How are one’s prayers accepted by Allah Most High?

Question Answer

In the Name of Allah, the Most Merciful and CompassionateAllah Most High says in the Qur’an, “Your Lord has proclaimed, “Call upon Me, I will respond to you. Surely those who are too proud to worship Me will enter Hell, fully humbled.” [Qur’an; 40:60]

Also, “When My servants ask you ˹O Prophet˺ about Me: I am truly near. I respond to one’s prayer when they call upon Me. So let them respond ˹with obedience˺ to Me and believe in Me, perhaps they will be guided ˹to the Right Way˺.

A Promise from Allah Most High

The above verses show that the supplication of the one who calls upon Allah Most High is certainly accepted. However, this must be understood in the context of the following two questions:

(1) Does this apply to everyone who supplicates?

In the Prophetic narrations, we see exceptions to the above verses. Some of these exceptions are as follows:

– supplicating with a heedless heart
– supplicating for sinful things
– supplicating and then giving up (due to not seeing the response)
– supplicating whilst one’s clothing, food, drink, nourishment are from prohibited (Haram) sources
– supplicating while in the state of disbelief

So it is clear that the verses of promised acceptance are not absolute.

(2) What does it mean that one’s supplication is answered?

Furthermore, Allah’s acceptance of one’s supplication does not necessitate that the person is given exactly what they asked for or given what they asked for immediately.

The Messenger of Allah (may Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “No Muslim makes a supplication, not containing sin or the cutting of family ties, except that Allah will give them one of three: Either what he supplicated for will be hastened for him, or it (i.e., the reward of his supplication) will be saved for him in the Hereafter, or Allah will avert from him an evil similar to what he supplicated for.” The Companions said, “In that case, we will make a lot (of supplications). He (may Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “Allah has much to give.” [Ahmad]

Even though the first thing that comes to one’s mind when they hear Allah’s promise of acceptance is the first type mentioned in the above narration, all three are understood as Allah’s accepting of one’s supplication.

Clarification

Thus the statement in the first link you attached –

” Allah accepts the prayer of a person who prays to Him after performing two ‘Rakaat ‘ of Salaat. Allah grants him what he prays for, sometimes immediately and sometimes (in his own interest) later.”

and that of the second link –

“No matter how much we ask Allah, and no matter how well, know that we may not always get what we want, in the matter and timing that we long for. Allah is All-Seeing and All-Knowing, and we are but finite beings. I pray that Allah grants you acceptance, contentment, and gratitude for His Decree.”

They are not contradictory at all.

The first applies to Allah accepting the supplication (i.e., none of the factors that would prevent a person’s supplication are found) either immediately, later, or by saving the Hereafter’s reward averting from the person an evil.

The second is true in light of the same reasons derived from the aforementioned narration.

Please see:
I hope this clarifies things.
Allah knows best
[Shaykh] Yusuf Weltch

Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Shaykh Yusuf Weltch is a teacher of Arabic, Islamic law, and spirituality. After accepting Islam in 2008, he then completed four years at the Darul Uloom seminary in New York, where he studied Arabic and the traditional sciences. He then traveled to Tarim, Yemen, where he stayed for three years studying in Dar Al-Mustafa under some of the greatest scholars of our time, including Habib Umar Bin Hafiz, Habib Kadhim al-Saqqaf, and Shaykh Umar al-Khatib. In Tarim, Shaykh Yusuf completed the memorization of the Qur’an and studied beliefs, legal methodology, hadith methodology, Quranic exegesis, Islamic history, and some texts on spirituality. He joined the SeekersGuidance faculty in the summer of 2019.

Is it sinful or disbelief to keep a copy of the Qur’an in a very messy room?

/in , /by

Question Summary

Is it sinful or disbelief to keep a copy of the Qur’an in a very messy room?

Question Answer

In the Name of Allah, the Most Merciful and Compassionate

It is not disbelief to keep one’s Qur’an in a messy room. It is, however, from the etiquettes of the Qur’an to keep it in a raised place. [Ibn ‘Abidin, Radd al-Muhtar]

Cleanliness is from Faith

Regarding the messy room, cleanliness is of the important fundamentals of Islam. The Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “Cleanliness is half of faith.” [Muslim]

This applies to spiritual and physical cleanliness and can also be applied generally to all aspects of the Believer’s life. For some, cleanliness and tidiness come naturally, and for others, it doesn’t. However, if you intend to follow the Prophet (may Allah bless him and give him peace), you will be rewarded for keeping up the tidiness of your room.

Hope this helps
Allah knows best
[Shaykh] Yusuf Weltch

Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Shaykh Yusuf Weltch is a teacher of Arabic, Islamic law, and spirituality. After accepting Islam in 2008, he then completed four years at the Darul Uloom seminary in New York, where he studied Arabic and the traditional sciences. He then traveled to Tarim, Yemen, where he stayed for three years studying in Dar Al-Mustafa under some of the greatest scholars of our time, including Habib Umar Bin Hafiz, Habib Kadhim al-Saqqaf, and Shaykh Umar al-Khatib. In Tarim, Shaykh Yusuf completed the memorization of the Qur’an and studied beliefs, legal methodology, hadith methodology, Quranic exegesis, Islamic history, and some texts on spirituality. He joined the SeekersGuidance faculty in the summer of 2019.