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Doubts about Purity after Waking Up

Shaykh Abdul-Rahim Reasat is asked about the relation between dreams that cause arousal, possible orgasm, and purity.

 

Question:

Assalam alaykum wa rahmat Allah wa barakatuh.

For the past few months I have been having so much hardships with regards to my purity after waking up. I didn’t even know women can have wet dreams until I came across something online. Since then I have doubts about everyday dream and try to replay it to see if it was a “wet dream.” My question is what exactly is a wet dream? What is the sexual climax in the dream? Is it the orgasm? If I have a dream where there is something sexual, or if I see someone I like but I don’t remember or did not have an orgasm do I need to do ghusl? On another website it said if you have a wet dream but don’t remember an orgasm or did not have an orgasm you don’t need to do ghusl. Is this okay? And in this case if you have a wet dream or any dream with something sexual, and didn’t or don’t remember having an orgasm so sexual climax but you do see discharge, do I have to still do ghusl?

Are all dreams where there is someone you like or an opposite gender, a wet dream. I mean in some dreams I see myself or someone holding hands. In some dreams there are opposite genders. In some dreams I see a wedding. In some dreams, I or someone is taking a shower but I don’t see any private parts. In some dreams I see someone I like so I feel butterflies. Sometimes I see someone I like or any male and I feel aroused. But to what extent should I know I had a wet dream?

I keep thinking that every dream with even the slightest bit of something sexual is a wet dream and when I see even the slightest bit of discharge I feel I need to take ghusl or I am impure and my prayers won’t be accepted. Please help me. I read the post on rules for men and women regarding wet dreams but that just confused me even more. In that answer, we are told if there is no discharge we don’t have to take a ghusl, but do we check for the discharge right after waking up?

What if you go to the washroom  20 minutes after waking up, etc., and the discharge has dried and you can no longer see it clearly on your underwear? Or sometimes I am wearing patterned underwear, so I cant make out the discharge that may be on it. Does it have to be discharge you can see right away, or do I have to look really really close to see if there is discharge? Because that’s what I do right now. I literally take my underwear off and bring it close to my eyes to check for spots or discharge.

Please help. Islam is a religion of ease, I don’t know why I am making it hard for myself. I am now scared of sleeping over at the homes of relatives because I always have to take a bath in the morning, and doubt every dream is a wet dream. Please help me with regard to this, may Allah bless you.

 

Answer:

Wa alaykum assaalam wa rahmat Allah wa barakatuh.

I pray you are well.

The dream is of no consequence. Whether it is sexual in nature or not, what the ruling in this situation is based on is the discharge.

The discharge here is of sexual fluids, and is likely to be much more than normal discharge. In the situation in question you would clearly see the trace of a large amount of liquid. If you are having to look up close at is there has not been any discharge.

So, in summary, if you see a discharge which is greater in quantity than the normal, white discharge, perform a ghusl. The dreams, and their intensity are of no consequence if no sexual fluids were discharged. (Shurunbulali, Maraqi al Falah).

You seem to be suffering from OCD. That is why you are making the practice of religion difficult on yourself. Please seek professional help for this, and you’ll find that religious matters will also seem easier.

This answer may also be of some benefit.

May Allah grant you the best of both worlds.

 

Checked and approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani.


 

 

Do I Need to Renew My Wudu at the Slightest Sexual Thought?

Answered by Ustadh Tabraze Azam

Question: As salam alaykum,

Does sexual discharge for a woman occur at the slightest sexual thought?

Answer: Wa alaikum assalam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,

I pray that this message finds you well, insha’Allah.

The basis is that pre-sexual fluid (madhi) is released upon sexual excitement. Clear vaginal discharge, however, is not filthy, nor does it invalidate your ablution (wudu) because it is considered to be akin to sweating.

It is unlikely that you are experiencing the former at the mere notion of an intimate experience. Ignore misgivings, and consider taking the following free class at SeekersHub: Absolute Essentials of Islam: Basic Hanafi Jurisprudence (STEP)

See also: A Reader on Waswasa (Baseless Misgivings)

And Allah alone knows best.

wassalam,

Tabraze Azam

Checked & Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Rules Regarding Ghusl and Wet Dreams for Men and Women

Answered by Ustadha Shaista Maqbool

Question: I have learned that if a women who has reached puberty has an erotic dream and sees some discharge afterwards, she has to make ghusl. If she sees discharge alone without remembering a dream, she would also have to take ghusl. But if she remembers only the dream without seeing discharge, she doesn’t have to take ghusl.
What if a women constantly has discharge? How does she know when to take ghusl and when not?

 

Answer: Wa’alaikum assalaam warahmatu Allah,

With regards to wet dreams, men and women have the similar rulings.

So, if a man or woman has a wet dream and he/she sees wetness/discharge they are obliged to make ghusl, even if they are not certain the wetness is from an ejaculation/orgasm. In other words, even if he/she has constant discharge and suspects the wetness not to be sexual discharge, ghusl is still obligatory if he/she recalls seeing a wet dream. The only exception is for a man when he knows that this discharge is wady – a thick white fluid which exits after urinating or carrying something heavy which is only present in men.

If one doesn’t remember a wet dream and sees discharge, there are two rulings:

1- he/she must do ghusl if he/she believes the discharge could be sexual fluid from an ejaculation/orgasm; i.e. the mere possibility of the discharge being sexual fluid is enough to make ghusl necessary.

2- If he/she knows that the fluid is madhy, i.e. that which exists when aroused (or a man knows it is wady), then he/she does not have to do ghusl.

If there is no discharge, even if one remembers a wet dream, he/she is not obliged to do ghusl.

And Allah knows best.

wasalaam,
Shaista Maqbool

Checked & Approved by Faraz Rabbani

Related Answers:

Waking Up with a Spot on Groin and Dealing with Baseless Misgivings (Waswasa)

Making Ghusl After Continual Exiting of Sexual Fluids

Answered by Ustadha Shaista Maqbool

Question: I understand that if one has an orgasm, a ghusl is required each time something exits from one’s private parts after intimate relations. However, because it is normal for most women to have discharge all day long even without any relations, how does one know whether what is coming out is sexual fluid or everyday discharge? When do the ghusls stop?

For example:

Husband and wife are intimate at 2 AM.
Wife experiences exiting of fluids afterwards.
She does ghusl before fajr at 5 AM.
Wife experiences the exiting of fluid all day thereafter.
It could be sexual fluid but it could also be her usual discharge.

Please help clarify this as its becoming a huge source of waswasa and hardship for me.

JazakAllahu khair,
Wasalaam

Answer: Wa’alaikum assalaam warahmatu Allah,

If a woman urinates after intercourse, if semen exits from her thereafter, she is only required to do wudu, not ghusl. Therefore she would only take one ghusl after intercourse.

If she has discharge after this, she does wudu if she is certain or predominantly believes the fluid exiting is semen. If she is uncertain (for example 50/50), she would consider it to be normal female discharge.

And Allah knows best.

Wasalaam,

Shaista Maqbool

Checked & Approved by Faraz Rabbani