Question: Assalamu ‘alaykum. I find it significantly more difficult to control my desires once I have shaved the pubic hairs from my private parts. As a result, this often leads me to masturbation. Since this act of purification is consistently leading me to a haram act, would it be alright in this case for me not to do it? Or should I begin doing it once I am married and have a venue to control my desires?
Wa ‘alaykum assalam wa rahmatullah wa barakatuh.
I pray you are well.
For now, you should space out the times when you shave if that will help you to control yourself better. Do not let it go over 40 days; that would be sinful.
Ask Allah for help and look for a means to help stop yourself. This seems like an addictive behavior of sorts. I encourage you to read “In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts” by Dr. Gabor Mate to get a clearer understanding of the matter. The Purify Your Gaze program may be of help to you.
Ultimately, you are asking Allah for help in obeying Him. Keep asking and keep making tawba if you slip. “Indeed, Allah loves those who thoroughly purify themselves and those who keep repenting.“ [Qur’an, 2:222]
May Allah facilitate the matter for you.
[Shaykh] Abdul-Rahim Reasat
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani
Shaykh Abdul-Rahim Reasat began his studies in Arabic Grammar and Morphology in 2005. After graduating with a degree in English and History he moved to Damascus in 2007 where, for 18 months, he studied with many erudite scholars. In late 2008 he moved to Amman, Jordan, where he continued his studies for the next six years in Sacred Law (fiqh), legal theory (Usul al-fiqh), theology, hadith methodology, hadith commentary, and Logic. He was also given licenses of mastery in the science of Quranic recital and he was able to study an extensive curriculum of Quranic sciences, tafsir, Arabic grammar, and Arabic eloquence.