Question: My parents force me to study medicine to the extent of abusing me, but I love Islamic studies and want to become a scholar and professor. They threaten me by saying that they will not pay for me and this field pays nothing. They say they will send me to do a tailoring job and marry me off. Alhamdulillah, there are many scholarships available, but they still abuse me emotionally and mentally. Though I have always been a topper of my school still they taunt me.
Thank you for your question. I empathize with your frustration and suffering regarding your parents. They should be proud of you, not taunt you, and support your wishes. Rest assured that they only want the best for you and that you be able to fulfill your obligations.
The short answer is that your parents cannot force you to do what they want by any means. In Islam, a parent’s control does not reach this far. My advice to you is to pray istikhara and follow that. If it is positive, then you should be sensitive and kind to your parents and gently tell them that you will follow your dream. Make the intention to be independent and try not to ask them for money. They cannot force you to become a tailor or marry, either.
If it is negative, then you should follow medicine, but use all of your free time for Islamic classes and to learn Arabic. I know many who are doctors in the West, but use their free time for Sacred Knowledge and learn with their children and spouses. They are very pious, God-fearing, and practicing men.
Please see these links as well:
May Allah reward you for wanting to please them and for doing your best to achieve a balance.
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani
Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria for two years where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, tafseer, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her Masters in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She recently moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.