Youth, Identity, and Islam: Fostering Healthy Religious Identities by Moulana Zakariyya Harneker
This is the third of four articles based on the On-Demand Course ‘Youth, Identity, and Islam’, which delves into the intersection of faith, identity, and societal challenges, providing practical strategies to build resilience and a strong sense of self.
Fostering Healthy Religious Identities
In building communities that foster healthy religious identities, discussions with youth might emphasize empowerment and self-discovery. This article explores how communities can create environments that nurture strong religious identities, emphasizing the Islamic perspective on identity and its role in positive social action and stronger networks.
Understanding Identity
Questions like Who am I?, What do I value?, and What do I want to achieve? are central to identity formation. While these questions may seem straightforward, they often take years to answer and remain a source of contemplation throughout life.
From an Islamic perspective, identity formation begins early. Initially, children are free of moral accountability. As they grow, they learn to distinguish right from wrong before reaching the age of accountability. Adolescence, however, is a critical period for answering fundamental identity questions, as youth grapple with external influences and internal struggles.
The Challenges of Modern Society
The modern world poses significant challenges to identity formation. We live in a hedonistic society where desires are often given precedence over moral and spiritual values. These external influences, combined with societal pressures, can shape identity in ways that conflict with Islamic values.
Ibn Qayyim (Allah have mercy on him) describes adolescence as a time when individuals face intense internal and external pressures. It is a period where guidance is crucial to help youth navigate these challenges and form strong, faith-centered identities.
The Role of Communities in Identity Formation
Communities play a pivotal role in helping young people form positive religious identities. This requires the support of positive socializers—individuals who pass on values, beliefs, and actions that align with Islam. Parents, friends, teachers, and mentors are all key contributors to this process.
A healthy community environment should instill:
- Competence: The belief that individuals can practice Islam successfully.
- Autonomy: The ability to make faith-driven decisions independently.
- Relatedness: A sense of belonging within the community.
Fostering a Sense of Competence
A sense of competence arises when individuals feel capable of living according to their faith. Communities must nurture this by providing tools, encouragement, and positive reinforcement.
Avoid Excessive Criticism
Criticism without constructive guidance can lead youth to feel incapable of being good Muslims. If all they hear is condemnation for their shortcomings, they may lose motivation and question their place in the faith.
The Prophet Muhammad (Allah bless him and give him peace) exemplified the ideal approach to fostering competence. He commended good deeds and provided gentle correction when necessary. Examples include:
- Praising Positive Actions: When a companion added a unique phrase to his prayer, the Prophet praised him, saying angels rushed to receive it.
- Encouraging Growth: When Bilal (Allah be pleased with him) was praised for his consistent prayers after performing wudu, it reinforced his sense of worth and encouraged others to follow suit.
- Defending Self-Worth: When a companion who struggled with drinking was criticized, the Prophet defended him, saying, “He loves Allah and His Messenger.” This acknowledgment reaffirmed the companion’s worth despite his shortcomings.
Building Positive Environments
To foster competence and a healthy religious identity, communities must:
- Model Positivity: Parents and leaders should embody the values they wish to instill, offering guidance through action and speech.
- Provide Encouragement: Celebrate progress and good deeds, no matter how small.
- Maintain Balance: While addressing shortcomings, ensure youth feel valued and capable of overcoming challenges.
Autonomy, Relatedness, and Community
In the journey of nurturing Islamic identity, understanding and implementing core psychological and spiritual needs is vital. Among these needs, autonomy and relatedness play crucial roles, serving as pillars for developing a strong and healthy connection to faith. Let us delve into how these concepts intersect with Islamic teachings and community building.
The Need for Autonomy
Autonomy refers to the intrinsic need to experience one’s behavior as self-driven and reflectively endorsed. As human beings, we have an inherent psychological need to feel that our actions are voluntary and aligned with our personal values—not imposed upon us begrudgingly or against our will.
This principle, rooted in the broader Self-Determination Theory, is significant in nurturing Islamic values within a community, particularly among young Muslims. For Muslims, the concept of autonomy must be balanced with the non-negotiable obligations of faith. For example, performing daily prayers is obligatory (fard), and it is the duty of Muslim parents to ensure their children fulfill such obligations. Yet, fostering autonomy means creating an environment where young Muslims choose to embrace these practices willingly, motivated by their love and understanding of Islam.
The modern world often promotes indulgence in desires, making the struggle against one’s lower self (nafs) more challenging. For young Muslims transitioning from childhood into adulthood, this can be a tumultuous phase. They must navigate newfound responsibilities and freedoms while staying rooted in their faith.
To support this, communities should focus on cultivating spaces that inspire young people to engage in Islamic practices voluntarily. These spaces should encourage youth to feel a personal connection to their faith, choosing Islam not out of compulsion but out of genuine belief and understanding.
The Flexibility of Islam
Islam, in its wisdom, provides a broad spectrum of permissible actions, allowing individuals to express their unique personalities and preferences within its guidelines. While certain actions, such as prayer and avoiding haram, are universal, there is ample room for individual interests and strengths to thrive.
For instance, a young person who excels in serving others might not have the same zeal for reciting the Quran as someone else. Instead of feeling inadequate, they should be celebrated for their strengths and gently encouraged to grow in other areas. The Prophet Muhammad (Allah bless him and give him peace) exemplified this approach by allowing his companions to retain their unique personalities while guiding them toward goodness.
The diversity of the Sahaba illustrates this beautifully. Abu Bakr (Allah be pleased with him) was gentle and empathetic, while Umar (Allah be pleased with him) was firm and commanding. Both were beloved to the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) and played vital roles in the community. This flexibility and acknowledgment of individual strengths must be mirrored in our communities today.
Relatedness: The Power of Belonging
Another critical element of a thriving Islamic identity is relatedness, the need to feel cared for and connected to a social group. Humans have an intrinsic desire to form and maintain meaningful relationships. This universal truth is reflected in the Arabic term for humans, insan, derived from unz, meaning familiarity or companionship.
In an Islamic context, relatedness manifests in fostering a sense of community, love, and mutual care. The Prophet Muhammad (Allah bless him and give him peace) emphasized this through his actions and teachings. Upon arriving in Madina, one of his first instructions was to spread peace:
“Spread the greeting of peace, feed the people, uphold family ties, and pray at night when others sleep, and you will enter Paradise in peace.”
Greeting others, whether known or unknown, not only fulfills a sunnah but also creates a sense of safety and belonging. When we say, Assalamu Alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh (Peace and blessings of Allah be upon you), we make a heartfelt dua for the other person, assuring them of our goodwill. This small act fosters trust and strengthens communal bonds.
The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) further reinforced the importance of community by establishing brotherhood between the Muhajirun and Ansar in Madina. The Ansar’s selflessness, as mentioned in the Quran:
“They give preference to others over themselves, even though they too are in need.” [Quran, 59:9]
This spirit of mutual care and generosity laid the foundation for a cohesive Muslim society.
Friendship and Community Building
Friendship serves as the building block of a strong community. The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) stated:
“A person is upon the religion of their close friend, so let them look carefully at whom they befriend.”
Choosing friends wisely ensures a supportive environment that encourages growth in faith. As individuals form bonds, these relationships extend outward to create a vibrant, welcoming community.
Lessons from the Prophet Muhammad (Allah bless him and give him peace)
In Islam, the teachings of the Prophet Muhammad (Allah bless him and give him peace) provide a profound framework for cultivating such communities, highlighting their importance and guiding us toward forming spaces that encourage personal and spiritual growth.
The Power of Good Company
The Prophet Muhammad (Allah bless him and give him peace) taught us the significance of the company we keep. In a famous hadith, he compares good and bad company to a perfume seller and a blacksmith. With the perfume seller, you either purchase fragrance or at least leave with a pleasant aroma. Conversely, the blacksmith might burn your clothes or leave you with an unpleasant smell.
This analogy emphasizes that our environment and the people we surround ourselves with deeply influence our character. Good company fosters positivity, while bad company can lead to undesirable consequences, even unintentionally. Thus, the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) encourages us to seek out and remain in the company of those who elevate us morally and spiritually.
Creating Positive Spaces for the Youth
Parents play a critical role in ensuring that their children are placed in environments conducive to forming a strong Muslim identity. While the pursuit of quality education or other aspirations is noble, placing young people in spaces devoid of good Muslim role models can be detrimental. A child’s identity is heavily influenced by their surroundings, and if they lack a supportive Muslim community, their sense of faith and belonging may weaken.
While some individuals may thrive in challenging environments, relying on such exceptions is unwise. Instead, it is our responsibility to create and promote spaces where Islamic values are upheld, and where young people can find like-minded companions who reinforce their faith.
For youth, the message is clear: situate yourself in environments where you can grow as a Muslim. Surround yourself with individuals who inspire you to uphold your values, rather than risk compromising them by frequenting spaces that encourage or normalize harmful behaviors.
The Role of Community in Strengthening Faith
A community, at its core, is a group of individuals united by shared values and interests. For Muslims, the ultimate shared value is their faith and devotion to Allah (Most High) and His Messenger (Allah bless him and give him peace). Prioritizing this shared bond allows us to create spaces that not only promote faith but also foster mutual growth.
The story of the Ashab al-Kahf (People of the Cave) offers a powerful example. These young men, striving to worship Allah in a hostile environment, found strength and solidarity by coming together. Allah (Most High) blessed them with His support, reinforcing the idea that faith-based communities provide resilience against external challenges.
Similarly, when Muslims gather with the shared purpose of pleasing Allah, their collective strength leads to good actions and encourages spiritual growth. Whether through attending religious classes, engaging in acts of remembrance (dhikr), or participating in community activities, these gatherings cultivate a sense of belonging and reinforce Islamic values.
The Sweetness of Faith
The Prophet Muhammad (Allah bless him and give him peace) described three qualities that allow a believer to taste the sweetness of faith:
- Loving Allah and His Messenger more than anyone else.
- Loving another person purely for the sake of Allah.
- Detesting a return to disbelief as much as one would detest being thrown into a fire.
These qualities underscore the importance of fostering relationships based on faith and mutual love for the sake of Allah. When Muslims come together with this intention, their faith is strengthened, and the joy of practicing Islam becomes more palpable.
The Ripple Effect of Good Communities
A well-established community centered on Islamic values not only strengthens individual identities but also fosters a culture of collective good. Shared activities within such communities, even recreational ones, are often free from harm and aligned with Islamic principles. More importantly, these spaces encourage the performance of good deeds, as individuals motivate and support one another.
As this cycle of mutual encouragement continues, good actions multiply, benefiting everyone involved. Furthermore, assisting others in expressing their Muslim identity aligns with the hadith: “Allah is in the service of His servant as long as the servant is in the service of his brother.”
The task of building and sustaining strong Muslim communities is both a personal and collective responsibility. It requires dedication, intentionality, and a deep commitment to Islamic values. By doing so, we can create environments where future generations not only feel a sense of belonging but are also inspired to grow into confident and committed Muslims.
Building communities that nurture healthy religious identities requires intentional effort. By fostering competence, autonomy, and relatedness, we can create environments where youth feel empowered to live as strong Muslims despite life’s challenges.
Let us follow the example of the Prophet Muhammad (Allah bless him and give him peace) in guiding, encouraging, and uplifting those around us. In doing so, we not only strengthen individual identities but also build resilient and thriving communities.
May Allah guide us in creating and maintaining these communities, strengthen our youth’s identities, and enable us to experience the sweetness of faith. May He bless us with His mercy and acceptance, and may our efforts lead to His pleasure.
