What Should I Do since Studying Islam Has Made Me Hate It?

Answered by Ustadha Shazia Ahmad

Question

I decided to learn about Islam and all went well up until it came to women. The more I learn the more, I see how hated women are and their low status. I hear that women have high status, but I see the following:

  1. Before you marry your father may prevent you from working, studying, or socializing if he wishes;
  2. Having a baby boy is better, hence two sheep are slaughtered at his birth;
  3. In marriage, you are a slave, and he has the right to deprive you of everything you love, even your parents and you have no choice;
  4. In Paradise, no woman gets what she desires, yet every man gets all he wants; if a man and a woman do the same good deed, the man will be given so much more;
  5. In the Hellfire, there will be more women.

Answer

Thank you for your question. I am so sorry that you feel that women have a lower status when they don’t.

Resources

All of the examples that you have cited don’t mean that women are hated, and you must know and trust that Allah is fair, and that Islam is perfect. A man is given different rewards and honors, according to the greater duties that he is bound to. Allah has also created the very natures of men and women differently, and hence their rewards and duties differently.

Please see these answers for detailed explanations:
Explaining Misunderstood Hadith About Women
Gender Inequality in Islam?
Reader on Women’s Ranks in the Hereafter

May Allah give you the best of this world and the next.
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria for two years where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, tafsir, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her Masters in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She later moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.