How Should I Go About Having Meetings With My Homosexual Brother?

Answered by Shaykh Riad Saloojee

Question: Assalamu alaykum

I am a muslim convert. I am married and have children. My brother came out as homosexual and is in a relationship with a man. I told him that I respect his way of life but don’t approve of it and that I don’t want my children to know about his lifestyle, which means that I want to see him alone without his boyfriend when the kids are around. He was very offended by my request. Am I doing the right thing?

Answer: Wa’alaykumsalam wa rahmatullah wa barakaatu,

I pray you are well, by Allah’s grace. What follows is a general answer, without regard to specific details that I do not have.

Our most important and precious relationship is with Allah. This relationship conditions our relationship with his creation.

As a general rule, we should either limit our exposure or not subject ourselves to relationships or environments which are detrimental to our relationship with Allah and the Divine moral values that are foundational to our faith.

Exposure to such relationships or environments will ultimately be harmful to our pursuit of happiness in this life and the Next.

This principle, while important for adults, is especially critical in regards to the raising and moral upbringing of our children, who are especially spiritually vulnerable and impressionable. Your desire to protect your children is rational and spiritually-sound parenting.

Allah states: O You who have faith, if you have a conscious reverence of Allah, He will grant you a criterion that clarifies… (Anfal: 29). May Allah open our hearts to that which He loves and give us the strength and wisdom to implement it.

Your brother,
[Shaykh] Riad Saloojee

Shaykh Riad Saloojee graduated and taught in an Islamic seminary in Cape Town, South Africa.  He is a lawyer by training and worked in the field of civil rights advocacy. Currently, he teaches and translates.