Can I Divorce Someone Who Is Not Giving Me Intimacy? (Shafi’i)

Answered by Shaykh Abdurragmaan Khan

Question: Assalam alaykum,

I have been married for several months now,my husband is caring and god fearing but we just live like friends. There is no intimacy whatsoever.

Do I have the right to seek divorce?

Answer: Wa alaykum al-Salam

May Allah bring ease to all your affairs.

One of the primary functions of the husband is to maintain the chastity of his wife. Since you do love and wish to be with your husband, I would suggest that you have a sitting with him, informing him that if the situation between you two does not change, you are considering separation. Also, inform him that you love him and are willing to assist him in anyway, for him to overcome this hurdle. It may be advisable for him or perhaps the both of you to meet a counselor or a psychologist.

Your concern is a real one and you have done well to reach out for assistance. May Allah allow both you and your husband to overcome this challenge. Another important practice is dua, pray to Allah as often as possible; break down before Him, for He loves the one that comes to Him broken hearted. May He accept your prayers and grant you what is best for you in this world and the next.

Wassalam
[Shaykh] Abdurragmaan Khan

Shaykh Abdurragmaan received ijazah ’ammah from various luminaries, including but not restricted to: Habib Umar ibn Hafiz—a personality who affected him greatly and who has changed his relationship with Allah, Maulana Yusuf Karaan—the former Mufti of Cape Town; Habib ‘Ali al-Mashhur—the current Mufti of Tarim; Habib ‘Umar al-Jaylani—the Shafi‘i Mufti of Makkah; Sayyid Ahmad bin Abi Bakr al-Hibshi; Habib Kadhim as-Saqqaf; Shaykh Mahmud Sa’id Mamduh; Maulana Abdul Hafiz al-Makki; Shaykh Ala ad-Din al-Afghani; Maulana Fazlur Rahman al-Azami and Shaykh Yahya al-Gawthani amongst others.