Should a Woman Consider Her Husband’s Desires First in Ramadan?
Answered by Ustadha Shazia Ahmad
Question
What takes precedence in a wife’s duty to her husband when it comes to acts of `ibadah (worship) like reading the Quran or praying the nafl prayer, tahajjud, or doing dhikr compared to marital relations? In Ramadan, the little time for potential`ibadah clashes with the time for intimacy (the night).
Does a wife need to ask permission from her husband in order to do the sunna acts of `ibada? Should a wife avoid reading Quran, or praying if she knows her husband is expecting to be intimate but would not disturb her if she is worshipping?
Answer
Thank you for your question. May Allah reward you for your efforts to worship and take full advantage of Ramadan.
Intimacy
It is more praiseworthy and more rewarding for you to be with your husband first and then worship after. There is enough time for both at night, and your reward will be manifold.
Thawban said that when “And those who hoard gold and silver” came down, they were with the Prophet (Allah bless him give him peace) on one of his journeys. One of his companions said, “It has come down about gold and silver. Would that we knew what property is best so that we might get it!” He replied, “The best property is a tongue which makes mention of God, a grateful heart, and a believing wife who helps a man with his faith.” [Ahmad; Tirmidhi; Ibn Majah]
Helping a man with his faith includes helping him to fulfill his needs, making it satisfying for both, and clearing both of your minds so that worship can be easier, genuine and stress-free.
Please see this as well:
How To Be A Better Spouse Seminar by Shaykh Irshaad & Shaykh Muhammad Carr
May Allah give you the best of this world and the next.
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani
Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria, for two years, where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, tafsir, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin and completed her Masters in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan, where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She later moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.
