Is It Permissible to Pray Allah Does Not Grant Me Children?
Answered by Ustadha Shazia Ahmad
Question
Is it permissible to ask Allah to prevent me from having children due to my trauma and mental state, considering I believe living child-free is best for me?
Answer
Thank you for your question. Your supplication would be permissible but is contrary to the Sunna and tradition of our religion and great Messenger (Allah bless him and give him peace).
Specific supplications
Allah (Most High) knows what is best for us, and we don’t. That being said, your du`a could be answered, and if you change your mind, you might not find recourse, although Allah has power over all things. I highly encourage you to avoid supplicating for circumstances that you think are best for you and to make the best supplication to Allah (Most High) which was taught to us by the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace).
Well-being and forgiveness
A man came to the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) and said: “O Messenger of Allah, what supplication is best? He said: ‘Ask your Lord for forgiveness and well-being in this world and in the Hereafter.’ Then (the man) came the next day and said: ‘O Messenger of Allah, what supplication is best?’ He said: ‘Ask your Lord for forgiveness and well-being in this world and the Hereafter.’ Then (the man) came the third day and said: ‘O Prophet of Allah, what supplication is best?’ He said: ‘Ask your Lord for forgiveness and well-being in this world and the Hereafter, for if you are forgiven and have well-being in this world and the Hereafter, you will have succeeded.’” [Ibn Maja]
This du`a contains the words of above:
اللّهُـمَّ إِنِّـي أسْـأَلُـكَ العَـفْوَ وَالعـافِـيةَ
في الدُّنْـيا وَالآخِـرَة ،
اللّهُـمَّ إِنِّـي أسْـأَلُـكَ العَـفْوَ وَالعـافِـيةَ
في ديني وَدُنْـيايَ وَأهْـلي وَمالـي ،
اللّهُـمَّ اسْتُـرْ عـوْراتي
وَآمِـنْ رَوْعاتـي ،
اللّهُـمَّ احْفَظْـني مِن بَـينِ يَدَيَّ وَمِن خَلْفـي
وَعَن يَمـيني وَعَن شِمـالي ،
وَمِن فَوْقـي ،
وَأَعـوذُ بِعَظَمَـتِكَ أَن أُغْـتالَ مِن تَحْتـي
O Allah, I seek Your forgiveness and Your protection in this world and the next. O Allah, I seek Your forgiveness and Your protection in my religion, in my worldly affairs, in my family and in my wealth. O Allah, conceal my secrets and preserve me from anguish. O Allah, guard me from what is in front of me and behind me,
from my left, and my right, and from above me. I seek refuge in Your Greatness from being struck down from beneath me. [Ibn Maja & Abu Dawud]
Another example of this kind of supplication is the supplication of Musa as we are told in the Quran: “…then he (Prophet Musa) said, “My Lord, indeed I am in need of whatever good You would send down to me.” [Quran, 28:24]
رَبِّ إِنِّي لِمَا أَنْزَلْتَ إِلَيَّ مِنْ خَيْرٍ فَقِيرٌ
Please see these links as well:
The Reality and Etiquettes of Supplication: A Reader
Is It Wrong to Stop Supplicating? Should One Be Specific When Supplicating?
Is It Selfish To Not Want Children?
Is It Obligatory to Try to Have Children?
Should I Marry a Woman Who Can No Longer Have Children?
May Allah give you the best of this world and the next.
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani
Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria for two years where she studied aqida, fiqh, tajweed, tafsir, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her Masters in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She later moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.
