How Can I Guide My Family to the Straight Path?

Answered by Ustadha Shazia Ahmad

Question

I was born into a Muslim family, but I never found a Muslim environment in my family. Almost all of my family members are highly involved in major sins. I was also involved in these kinds of stuff, but recently, I was guided by Allah Most High. I now realize the importance of prayer and other acts of worship, and I am trying my best to become a real Muslim. Now that I have learned the basic rulings of Sharia, I get angry at my family members when my parents flirt with non-mahrams and expose their awra. And every time I assist my parents, it causes me to miss prayers on time. So I make qada of prayers almost every day. I really need help. I tried to give them da`wa, but they rejected it and humiliated me. What can I do?

Answer

Thank you for your question. I empathize with your frustration at the challenges you face, but I am certain that it will get easier if you organize your time better, and choose gentleness instead of harshness.

Guiding Family

Allah Most High has told us in the Quran, “O believers! Protect yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is people and stones, overseen by formidable and severe angels, who never disobey whatever Allah orders—always doing as commanded.” [Quran, 66:6]

And the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “Allah is gentle and loves gentleness, and He grants reward for it that He does not grant for harshness.” [Ibn Maja]

We can see from Allah’s words the importance of advising family, but it can be done in many ways; you must review the principles of commanding the good and forbidding evil. The best way is through gentleness. You can share what you have learned. You can show them greater respect and honor, as that is what Islam calls for. You can choose silence when they get angry at you out of patience. And most of all, you can quietly practice the religion, and they will notice the fruits, the benefits, the transformation, and the light, and be guided by what they see.

Please see the best tips I can give you here:

• What Are the Criteria for Enjoining Good and Forbidding Evil?
• Guiding One’s Family Towards the Good: Advice & Tips
• How Can I Guide My Irreligious Family?
• How Should I Advise My Non-Practicing Family Members?
• How Can I Guide My Parents to the Right Path?
• Am I Accountable if My Family Doesn’t Practice Islam?

Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria, for two years, where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, tafsir, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin and completed her Master’s in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan, where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She later moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.