How Can I Be Nicer to People at Work When I Am Tired?

Answered by Ustadha Shazia Ahmad


I work in customer service, and there are a lot of people I have to deal with every day, due to which I feel extremely tired. I try my best to keep calm, but sometimes, I get very irritated when a customer argues or pesters me when I reject their applications. Consequently, I get angry and share my point of view in a louder tone, which appears rude to others. After this, I feel bad as a Muslim who wears the hijab. Sometimes, I have Muslim customers, too. I do not intend to be rude, but I really get irritated when people do not collaborate. Can you advise?


Thank you for your question. I empathize with your exhaustion and frustration, and I pray that Allah rewards you for recognizing where you need to improve.


The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “The believer who mixes with people and bears their annoyance with patience will have a greater reward than the believer who does not mix with people and does not put up with their annoyance.” [Ibn Maja]

Many people go through what you are going through, and the best way forward is to catch yourself before you lose it and recognize your triggers. In order to emulate the spiritual states of the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace), you must be focused on a long-term goal of improving your behavior, showing good character, and choosing the higher road when dealing with people. Nothing is uglier than a person who ages while increasing in bad character and impatience.

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May Allah give you the best of this world and the next.
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria, for two years, where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, tafsir, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin and completed her Master’s in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan, where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She later moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.