Do I Have to Obey My Husband in Everything?

How Do We Manage Our Finances When I Have a New Baby and My Husband Is Still in School?

Answered by Ustadha Rukayat Yakub

Question: Assalamu Alaikum

I was the main provider for my family (husband and I) as my husband is still in school. Before the baby I was making a sufficient income working only part time. After the baby, I quit my job & my husband got a part time minimum wage position.

My husband’s income now can barely cover bills. He is still in college. We do not have any family nearby who can watch my baby so I can go to work. Is it permissible to get government assistance (WIC) so I can stay at home?  Or should I find a part time job and daycare for the baby?

My husband wants me to stay home with the baby but is open to the idea of me working and putting the baby in daycare if the finances get tighter. I do not want to put my baby in daycare as I’d rather raise him myself or have family help me, which is not currently an option. Keeping in mind that if I work only part time, I will be able to make a comfortable wage that will allow my husband to work less and focus more on school. The baby is currently being breastfed as well.

Answer: Bismillah

Assalaamu alaikum wa rahmatullah Dear Sister,

If you haven’t already done this you should both sit down together and write out a monthly budget for the family.  Also look at what your budget would be if you worked and if you didn’t, taking into account the cost of quality daycare, transportation to and from work and to and from daycare etc.  Also make the Guidance Prayer about the situation.   If you both are uncomfortable with putting such a young child in daycare, do not.  Enrolling in a government program is not ideal, but it is permissible.  WIC is a public health program designed to improve the health of the families who participate and it funded by the federal government.  If enrolling in such a program will enable your family to live off your husband’s salary and you to be home with your daughter, then it might be a good temporary solution for your family.

Since you aren’t comfortable taking when you are physically able to work I would also suggest you look into work from home opportunities and even consider starting your own business from home, but do bare in mind that you being home with your child is work and it is saving tax dollar money.

Alhamdulillah your family has a long term financial plan, and in sha Allah once your husband finishes school you staying home with your daughter will no longer be an issue.

May Allah ta’ala give you ease in all your affairs and place immense barakah in the provision His gives you.

Your sister,
Rukayat Yakub

Checked & Approved by Faraz Rabbani