Answered by Ustadh Tabraze Azam
Question: As salam alaykum,
I always have bad thoughts regarding Allah and his messenger (peace be upon him). At first these thoughts were making me crying but now, even if I still hate these thoughts they don’t make me cry anymore. Am I getting accustomed to them? Am I starting to be a disbeliever?
Answer: Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
I pray that this message finds you well, insha’Allah.
You are a Muslim. Remember that “bad thoughts” also arose in the minds of the Companions (sahab) of the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and give him peace).
They said, “We find in ourselves [thoughts] that any of us would consider too enormous to even mention.” He (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “And you all have found it?” and they said yes. He said, “That is pure faith.” [Muslim]
However, continue seeking repentance, as this is the sign of those who are close to Allah Most High, and strive to seek out ways to increase in worship, knowledge and remembrance, gradually, whilst not omitting any responsibilities you have.
Shaykh Nuh Keller comments, “As long as one has fear and disgust for passing thoughts of unbelief (kufr) and the like and does not make them convictions, they do no harm.” [Sea Without Shore]
And Allah alone knows best.
Checked & Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani