What Are a Woman’s Rights over Her Husband?

Answered By Shaykh Dr. Muhammad Fayez Awad

Question

What are a woman’s rights over her husband?

Answer

All praise is due to Allah, Lord of the worlds. Blessings and peace be upon the Messenger of Allah, his Family, and his Companions.

Marriage is essentially a partnership between a man and a woman aimed at raising a righteous generation that worships their Lord and builds and prospers in life. The essence of marriage in Islam is the establishment of love, affection, and altruism between two individuals. For the continuity of their companionship, Allah has established rights for both men and women that must be fulfilled.

Allah (Most High) says:

“O humanity! Be mindful of your Lord, Who created you from a single soul, and from it, He created its mate, and through both, He spread countless men and women. And be mindful of Allah—in Whose Name you appeal to one another—and (honor) family ties. Surely Allah is ever Watchful over you.” [Quran, 4:1]

Allah has imposed specific rights upon husbands toward their wives. Those who preserve and fulfill these rights have upheld the Prophet’s (Allah bless him and give him peace) advice regarding their family. The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said,

“Treat women well.” [Bukhari; Muslim]

He also said,

“The best of you are the best to their families, and I am the best to my family.” [Ibn Hibban; Tirmidhi; Darimi]

Among these rights are:

Commanding the Wife to Obey Allah

The foundation of marriage is to support obedience to Allah. Allah permitted marriage to assist in His worship and to be a means to His mercy. It is obligatory for the husband to command his wife to do what Allah has commanded and to forbid her from what Allah has prohibited. Allah points to this significant right in His saying:

“Bid your people to pray, and be diligent in (observing) it. We do not ask you to provide. It is We Who provide for you. And the ultimate outcome is (only) for (the people of) righteousness.” [Quran, 20:132]

Good Treatment and Kind Companionship

The wife is a trust with the husband; he must treat her well in speech and actions. Allah (Most High) says:

“Treat them fairly.” [Quran, 4:19]

The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said:

“A believer should not hate a believing woman; if he dislikes one of her characteristics, he will be pleased with another.” [Muslim; Bayhaqi; Ahmad]

Protecting and Respecting the Wife

Jealousy over the wife is a natural feeling. Sa‘d Ibn ‘Ubada (Allah be pleased with him) asked the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and give him peace), saying: “If I saw a man with my wife, I would strike him with the sword, and not with the flat of it.”

The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) responded:

“Are you amazed at Sa‘d’s jealousy? I am more jealous than he is, and Allah is more jealous than I am. Because of Allah’s jealousy, He has forbidden immorality, both apparent and hidden.” [Bukhari; Muslim]

Fulfilling the Wife’s Needs

This is an established right of the wife, affirmed in the Sunna. In an agreed-upon hadith narrated by ‘Abdullah Ibn ‘Amr Ibn al-‘As (Allah be pleased with him), he said: The Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and give him peace) said to me:

“O Abdullah, have I not been informed that you fast all day and stand in prayer all night?” I said, “Yes, O Messenger of Allah.” He said: “Do not do that. Fast and break your fast, pray and sleep, for your body has a right over you, your eyes have a right over you, and your wife has a right over you, and your visitor has a right over you” [Ibid.]

The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) thus affirmed that the wife has a right over her husband.

Moreover, fulfilling this right is also considered a form of worship for which a man is rewarded. Abu Dharr al-Ghifari (Allah be pleased with him) reported that the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said:

“In the sexual act of each of you, there is charity.” They said: “O Messenger of Allah, when one of us fulfills his desire, will he have a reward for that?” He said: “Do you not see that if he were to do it in an unlawful manner, he would have a burden of sin? Likewise, if he does it in a lawful manner, he will have a reward.” [Muslim]

Maintaining the Wife’s Secrets

This is a shared right between both spouses. Abu Sa‘id al-Khudri (Allah be pleased with him) reported that the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and give him peace) said:

“Among the most evil of people in position before Allah on the Day of Resurrection is a man who has intercourse with his wife and she with him, then he spreads her secrets.” [Ibid.]

Spousal Maintenance

Maintenance encompasses food, clothing, and housing. These are three essential aspects that the husband should consider in his spending on his wife, family, and children. Allah (Most High) says:

“Men are the caretakers of women, as men have been provisioned by Allah over women and tasked with supporting them financially.” [Quran, 4:34]

Allah (Most High) also says:

“Let them live where you live (during their waiting period), according to your means. And do not harass them to make their stay unbearable.” [Quran, 65:6]

The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) was asked about a wife’s right over her husband, and he said:

“That you feed her when you eat, and clothe her when you clothe yourself, and do not strike her face, and do not insult her, and do not forsake her except in the house.” [Abu Dawud]

‘Aisha (Allah be pleased with her) narrated that Hind bint ‘Utba said:

“O Messenger of Allah, Abu Sufyan is a stingy man and does not give me enough for me and my children, except what I take from him without his knowledge.” He said: “Take what is sufficient for you and your children, according to what is customary.” [Bukhari; Muslim]

Overlooking the Wife’s Faults and Mistakes

It is well established that human beings are not perfect; rather, it is in human nature to err. Therefore, it is just and fair for a man to overlook small mistakes and transient faults. As mentioned earlier, the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said:

“A believer should not hate a believing woman; if he dislikes one of her characteristics, he will be pleased with another.” [Muslim]

A wise and noble husband does not reprimand his wife for the slightest mistake or hold her accountable for every slip. Instead, he seeks excuses for her and interprets her actions in the best possible way. He then offers her advice to the best of his ability.

Fairness Between Wives If There Is More Than One

The basis for this right is Allah’s saying:

“But if you are afraid you will fail to maintain justice, then (content yourselves with) one or those (bondwomen) in your possession. This way, you are less likely to commit injustice.” [Quran, 4:3]

We ask Allah (Most High) for protection, safety, and wellness from every ailment and to guide us in following the example of the Master of the Prophets. Allah bless him and give him peace and his Family and Companions.

[Shaykh] Dr. Muhammad Fayez Awad