How Can a Married Man Handle the Lack of Intimacy in His Relationship?

Hanafi Fiqh

Answered by Mawlana Ilyas Patel


I have read this answer which indicates that masturbation is permissible due to lack of intimacy and fear of Zina.

This is written from a female perspective. Please advise if it is also the case for men.


In the Name of Allah, the Most Merciful and Compassionate.

I pray you are in good faith and health.

Marital Intimacy

The fulfillment of marital intimacy is one of the most important aspects of marriage. It is essential you share your marital intimacy case with a reliable local and mature scholar and Muslim marital counselor.

However, sit down with your wife – if you haven’t yet – and speak to her about it in detail, and take each step to allow her to change and find a cure or way.

Duas and Prayer of Need

Perform the Prayer of Need daily and ask Allah Most High for a cure for her lack of intimacy, overall good health, and marital guidance.

Other Forms of Sexual Fulfilment

If your wife allows, you can request her in the meantime to allow her to perform hand masturbation on you, or if she doesn’t, you can do so to keep away from adultery (zina).

Given the considerations in such cases, we urge you to please consult reliable local scholars, qualified urologists, and Muslim marriage counselors and therapists about the specifics of the situation.

May Allah facilitate all ease and good for you both, amin

How Does One Perform The Prayer Of Need (Salat al-Haja)?
Can I Perform Oral Sex On My Husband?
Guilty about Engaging in Oral Sex

I pray this helps with your question.
[Mawlana] Ilyas Patel
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Mawlana Ilyas Patel is a traditionally-trained scholar who has studied in the UK, India, Pakistan, Syria, Jordan, and Turkey. He started his early education in the UK. He went on to complete the hifz of the Quran in India, then enrolled in an Islamic seminary in the UK, where he studied the secular and ‘Aalimiyya sciences. He then traveled to Karachi, Pakistan. He has been an Imam in Rep of Ireland for several years. He has taught hifz of the Quran, Tajwid, Fiqh, and many other Islamic sciences to children and adults onsite and online extensively in the UK and Ireland. He taught at a local Islamic seminary for 12 years in the UK, where he was a librarian and a teacher of Islamic sciences. He currently resides in the UK with his wife. His interest is a love of books and gardening.