How to Deal with Sexual Urges after Divorce?

Answered by Ustadha Shazia Ahmad

Question

I’m currently separated from my husband and living with my family. He is not speaking to me or reaching out in any way, and I’ve been hurt by this tremendously, so I have stopped making efforts to contact him.

Unfortunately, my sex drive is very high, and I do not know how to cope with being married for many years and now not having any outlet. Can you please give me some guidance?

Answer

The situation you describe is an unfortunate one. I pray you to unite with your husband again in a happy marriage and leave these problems behind you.

Please see these links that answer your question:
Sexual Urge when Spouse Works Overseas
Sexual Urges and Masturbation

In short, sister, there is no easy solution. One can fast a few times a week to curb the desire and enjoy the tremendous health benefits of fasting.

One can also distract oneself with a beneficial hobby, exercise, spending time in the fresh air, or doing charity. Otherwise, you should consider re-marrying if you are finalizing a divorce with your husband. I pray that this works for you in all aspects.

May Allah bless your family and give you the best.

[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria for two years where she studied aqida, fiqh, tajweed, tafsir, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her Masters in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She later moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.