Should I Drop the Requirement That My Future Wife Wear Hijab?


Answered by Ustadha Shazia Ahmad

Question

I’m looking to get married, and I want to marry someone who not only prays five times a day, fasts, and has good akhlaq, but also wears hijab and dresses modestly. Is it reasonable to want to marry a hijabi, or is someone who doesn’t do hijab but is otherwise a practicing Muslim sufficient?

I ask because finding a hijabi who also meets my other requirements is proving to be difficult, and I’m being advised to let go of this particular requirement, as there are many women who are great Muslims but don’t wear hijab.

Answer

Thank you for your question. May Allah reward you for your sincerity and commitment to finding a practicing, religious wife.

High Standards

Having a high religious standard for a wife is always a good idea, and I don’t advise you to drop your standards. If one should excel in academics and in one’s career, why not seek excellence in your life partner? A young lady who covers herself will hopefully pass on the right teachings to her children and raise the spiritual standard of the home and bring peace and blessings into it, in sha’ Allah. My only advice to you is that you inquire about her character because the hijab may not necessarily reflect that she is a good person on the inside.

Follow the Prophetic advice as best as you can and be patient. The right girl will come, in sha’ Allah. The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “A woman is married for four things: for her wealth, for her lineage, for her beauty or for her piety. Select the pious, may you be blessed! “[Bukhari; Muslim]

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May Allah give you the best of this world and the next.
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria, for two years, where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, tafsir, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin and completed her Master’s in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan, where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She later moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.