Love, Good Character, and Mercy Between Spouses

Answered by Ustadh Tabraze Azam

Question: There is a famous hadith often cited by people and they state the source as Sahih al-Bukhari and Sunan at-Tirmidhi. The Hadith is: “When a husband and wife look at each other with love, Allah looks at both with Mercy” [Bukhari 6:19 & Tirmidhi 14:79]. Could you state that if the hadith is a fabrication or it does really exist?

Answer: Wa alaikum assalam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,

I hope you are in the best of health and spirits, insha’Allah.

This narration (hadith) is not related by Bukhari and Tirmidhi in their respective collections.

Though, it is a narration (hadith) found in Imam Suyuti’s al-Jami` al-Saghir, and seemingly taken from Rafi`i’s Tarikh. However, it appears to be very weak at best.

The Soundness of Its Meaning

Nevertheless, the meaning is sound as understood from Qur’anic verses and other prophetic narrations.

Allah Most High says, “And among His Signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that ye may dwell in tranquility with them, and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts): verily in that are Signs for those who reflect.” [30:21]

Mercy is a quality that induces excellent conduct. It is a concern for good.

The Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “The believers best in faith are those best in character, and the best of you are those best to their spouses.” [Tirmidhi] Munawi explains that this includes being patient with them, constantly cheerful, and treating them with excellence. [Munawi, Fayd al-Qadir]

And Allah knows best.


Tabraze Azam

Checked & Approved by Faraz Rabbani