Can My First Cousin Refuse Me as a Suitor?
Hanafi Fiqh
Answered by Mawlana Ilyas Patel
Question
Can a mahram refuse my proposal to marry my first cousin just because we’re cousins, even though our families accept it? She didn’t refuse when I expressed my interest, and we share alignment in faith, status, and affection from childhood.
Answer
In the Name of Allah, the Most Merciful and Compassionate
I pray you are in good faith and health. Thank you for your question.
Indeed, it is permissible to marry your cousin. However, a cousin may decline the proposal if they do not wish to marry. In your situation, your cousin has indirectly accepted a willingness to marry you. There is no better situation than when two people mutually desire to marry.
Marriage is Best for Those Who Love Each Other
Ibn Abbas (Allah be pleased with him) reported that the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “We do not see for those who love one another anything like marriage.” [Ibn Maja]
I pray to Allah Most High to bless your marriage, and may it be a means for ever-growing love, compromise, and harmony between the families and having righteous and healthy children, amin.
I would like you to go through the valuable answers and links below. You will receive guidance and direction in sha Allah.
Related
- Love, Marriage, and Relationships in Islam: All Your Questions Answered (seekersguidance.org)
- Etiquette of Marriage: A Comprehensive SeekersGuidance Reader
- What Makes A Marriage Work – Shaykh Hamza Yusuf – SeekersGuidance
- Keys to Successful Muslim Marriages: Practical lessons that explain the Prophetic Spirit of Marriage
- Making Love Last: Prophetic Principles for a Successful Marriage
- Marriage in Islam: Practical Guidance for Successful Marriage
- The Path of Muhammad: Birgivi’s Manual of Taqwa Explained – YouTube
- Istikhara, The Prayer of Seeking Guidance: The Ultimate Guide – A Reader – SeekersGuidance
- Prayer of Repentance: Salat al-Tawba – SeekersGuidance
Why not begin your search for knowledge by signing up for a course on SeekersAcademy (seekersguidance.org), Making Love Last (seekersguidance.org)
I pray this helps with your question.
[Mawlana] Ilyas Patel
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani
Mawlana Ilyas Patel is a traditionally-trained scholar who has studied in the UK, India, Pakistan, Syria, Jordan, and Turkey. He started his early education in the UK. He went on to complete the hifz of the Quran in India, then enrolled in an Islamic seminary in the UK, where he studied the secular and ‘Aalimiyya sciences. He then traveled to Karachi, Pakistan. He has been an Imam in Rep of Ireland for several years. He has taught hifz of the Quran, Tajwid, Fiqh, and many other Islamic sciences to children and adults onsite and online extensively in the UK and Ireland. He taught at a local Islamic seminary for 12 years in the UK, where he was a librarian and a teacher of Islamic sciences. He currently resides in the UK with his wife. His interest is a love of books and gardening.
