How Can I Right the Wrong of Stealing Money from My Dad?
Answered by Ustadha Shazia Ahmad
Question
I used to steal money from my father. After repenting, I tried to pay it all back, but firstly, I don’t know the exact amount, and secondly, it’s much for me because my income is not a lot. I thought about confessing to him and seeking his forgiveness so that I don’t have to pay it all back, but my father is an old man, and I don’t want to hurt his feelings.
Also, I fear he might never trust me again because of this horrible thing I’ve done. I love him so much and don’t want to make him sad. If I confess to him, can I lie a bit to avoid harm or hide the amount I think I stole, or is this wrong and blameworthy?
Answer
Thank you for your question. May Allah reward you for your regret and for your willingness to pay your father back.
Tawba
Stealing is a major sin, and you must repent. Allah’s forgiveness is vast, and He loves that His servants repent for their sins, so you should not despair of His mercy.
Allah Most High says, “O My slaves who have wronged themselves! Never lose hope in the mercy of Allah. Verily, Allah forgives all sins. Indeed, He is the Most Forgiving and the Most Merciful.” [Quran; 39:53]
The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “The one who repents from sin is like one who never sinned.” [Ibn Majah]
The following are conditions for repentance when one’s sin involves the property of another:
- One must immediately stop sinning.
- One must regret the sin.
- One must resolve never to return to the sin.
- One must return the items or their value to their rightful owner. [Nawawi, Riyad al-Salihin]
How
You don’t need to tell your father as this will break his heart, he won’t trust you, and your relationship with him will be worsened. Pay him back by making up other reasons to give him money. You can repay him slowly over time since the amount is too much for you now. Give him monetary gifts (keeping the intention to yourself) on his birthday, Eid, or even Father’s Day. Perhaps you can deposit the funds into his account slowly over time or just put little amounts in his wallet. Overestimate the amount you owe him and go with that.
Please see these links as well:
- How to Redress Wrong From Stealing?
- How Can I Repent From Stealing From My Mother?
- How Do I Repent From the Theft I Committed Many Years Ago When I Was a Teenager?
- Returning Stolen Property.
- How Do I Repent From Petty Theft When I Was Young?
May Allah give you the best of this world and the next.
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani
Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria, for two years, where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, tafsir, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin and completed her Master’s in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan, where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She later moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.
