My First Love Still Wants Me Despite My Marriage. What Should I Do?


Answered by Ustadh Tabraze Azam

Question: Assalam alaykum

I loved a man for several years. His mother did not approve of me and said bad things about me. After several months of convincing, she agreed. However it was my dad’s turn to refuse. I got married straight away to another person. I am indifferent to my husband and don’t feel the desire to have marital relations with him. I still love the first person who has told me that he still wants to get married to me. What should I do?

Answer: Wa alaikum assalam wa rahmatullah,

You need to break off all contact with this other man immediately. Then, you should strive to make your marriage work, as this is what was destined for you, and there is good in it. This is worship, and with gratitude, your blessings and love will increase. Ask Allah Most High for facilitation, and don’t let the devil deceive you and help in ruining your life.

Consider taking: Marriage in Islam: Practical Guidance for Successful Marriages

Please see: As a Married Woman, Can I Long For Another Married Man—At Least as a Mate in Paradise? and: Why Has Allah Allowed Me to Fall in Love With Someone I Can’t Marry? and: Advice to Single Sisters Entangled with Married Men – Ustadha Hosai Mojaddidi

And Allah Most High alone knows best.

wassalam,

[Ustadh] Tabraze Azam

Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Ustadh Tabraze Azam holds a BSc in Computer Science from the University of Leicester, where he also served as the President of the Islamic Society. He memorised the entire Qur’an in his hometown of Ipswich at the tender age of sixteen, and has since studied the Islamic Sciences in traditional settings in the UK, Jordan and Turkey. He is currently pursuing advanced studies in Jordan, where he is presently based with his family.