How Do I Know if I Treat My Wife Well for the Sake of Allah Alone?

Answered by Ustadha Shazia Ahmad


It is from the sunnah to treat one’s wife with love, kindness, and respect. However, how does one know that one is doing this for the sake of Allah Most High and not exclusively out of love for one’s wife? I love my wife very much and I feel like when I try and make her happy I am doing it for her sake and not for Allah’s.

How can I begin to fix this? Am I just overthinking it?


Thank you for your question. Yes, you are overthinking it. Continue to do what you are doing and bring Allah to mind before you perform your good deeds.


Everyone will have that which they intended, but that doesn’t mean that you should stop doing good deeds if you doubt your intentions. You should continue on this path, and work on reminding yourself of your Lord, often. Say Bismillah before you perform good deeds, make supplications throughout your morning and evening, and build a relationship with Allah gradually. As it builds, you will find that your heart never fails to remember Him and He is present with you at all times.

Please see these links for more details:
Intentions Purely for Allah
A Reader on Sincerity, Intention, and the Purpose of Spiritual Routines
Intention: Validity and Sincerity
What is a Right Intention?

May Allah give you the best of this world and the next.
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria for two years where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, tafsir, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her Masters in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She later moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.