Struggling to Find a Spouse After a Divorce.

Answered by Shaykh Farid Dingle

Question: Assalamu alaykum

I have been divorced 5 years ago. Now I am struggling to find a spouse. I have prayed and tried everything. How do I make it better? How to get my peace back?

Answer: Assalamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,

Dear questioner,

You just have to keep making dua, and trying different suitors. Make sure you don’t get too picky yourself.

Ibn Ata Allah said, ‘May it lessen off you the pain of your affliction that fact that it is He (glorified beyond description) who is trying you with it.’

You have to see Allah before and after the difficulty. You have to look to how it can be improving you inwardly and what afflictions and problems He is saving you from.

Always look to those who are worst off than you. The Prophet (Allah bless him and grant him peace) said, ‘Look at those who are worse off than you and do not look at those who are better off, for this will keep you from belittling Allah’s favour to you.’ [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]

Please also have a read of the following answer.

I pray this helps.

[Shaykh] Farid Dingle

Shaykh Farid Dingle grew up in a convert family in Herefordshire, UK. In 2007, he moved to Jordan to pursue traditional studies. Shaykh Farid continues to live in Amman, Jordan with his wife and kids. In addition to continuing his studies he teaches Arabic and several of the Islamic sciences.

Shaykh Farid began his journey in sacred knowledge with intensives in the UK and Jordan (2004) in Shafi’i fiqh and Arabic. After years of studying Arabic grammar, Shafi’i fiqh, hadith, legal methodology (usul al-fiqh) and tafsir, Sh. Farid began specializing in Arabic language and literature. Sh. Farid studied Pre-Islamic poetry, Umayyad, Abbasid, Fatimid, and Andalusian literature. He holds a BA in Arabic Language and Literature and continues exploring the language of the Islamic tradition.

In addition to his interest in the Arabic language Shaykh Farid actively researches matters related to jurisprudence (fiqh) which he studied with Shaykh Hamza Karamali, Shaykh Ahmad Hasanat, and continues with Shaykh Amjad Rasheed.