Ustadha Raidah Shah Idil is asked whether there are specific dua one can recite that makes the desired person become one’s spouse.
Assalam alaykum wa rahmat Allah wa barakatuh.
I am interested in marrying my friend, but the problem is that he does not want to get married right now. He likes me, but we haven’t talked about marriage. He says he is not ready.
I am praying hard to Allah to make me his wife. when he gets ready. Meanwhile I’ve said no to all proposals.
I’ve become very spiritual. I started tahajjud, reading Qur’an, and making duas. I make istighfar a lot. Sometimes my heart just says he is the one. I don’t know when we will get married. Is there any dua by which we can get married fast?
Wa alaykum assalam wa rahmat Allah wa barakatuh.
I pray this finds you well. May Allah reward you for reaching out to us.
Being Ready For Marriage
Dear sister, please know that when a good man wants to marry you, he will ask for your hand in marriage, and do everything it takes to make that happen.
It sounds like you are in love with this young man, but he is not reciprocating your affections. You describe him as liking you. If he has not mentioned wanting to marry you, then my advice to you is this: ask him, if he is keen to marry you, and how long that will take.
Supplication To Marry
You may recite the following supplications for a spouse anytime:
رَبَّنَا هَبْ لَنَا مِنْ أَزْوَاجِنَا وَذُرِّيَّاتِنَا قُرَّةَ أَعْيُنٍ وَاجْعَلْنَا لِلْمُتَّقِينَ إِمَاماً
“Our Lord! Grant unto us spouses and offspring who will be the comfort of our eyes, and give us (the grace) to lead the righteous.” (Sura al-Furqan 25:74)
رَبِّ إِنِّي لِمَا أَنزَلْتَ إِلَيَّ مِنْ خَيْرٍ فَقِيرٌ
“My lord, I am in absolute need of the good You send me.” (Sura al-Qasas 28:24)
When you are young and unmarried, it is natural to want to seek out companionship. Allah created us to long for connection and heartfelt relationships. And when you are in love, hearts and eyes become blinded.
You are your own woman. You do not need a man to inspire you to greater heights of worship. Choose to do so, willingly, because you are responsible for your own soul. A loving husband can be a precious and beloved helpmate to Allah, but do not give your heart away to anyone until he is married to you.
Trials of attachment are painful indeed. Longing to marry someone who does not want to marry you back is very heartbreaking. Dear sister, you are beloved to Allah. He honors you with Islam. Please do not waste your time on a man who does not value you enough to marry you. And from this heartbreak, I urge you to choose your husband wisely.
Prepare for marriage by studying and reading about it – love and attraction are insufficient to sustain a successful Islamic marriage. Marriage in Islam: Practical Guidance for Successful Marriages is an excellent starting point.
I pray that Allah guides you to what will benefit you most in this life as well as the next.
Checked and approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani.