What Should I Do When I Struggle With My Faith?
Hanafi Fiqh
Answered by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani
Question
I am sixteen, and although I still believe, I have started to wish Islam were not true; everything feels so strict that I feel I am suffocating, and I want to know how to find peace and happiness in my religion again.
Answer
In the Name of Allah, the Most Merciful and Compassionate.
What you have written is more honest than most people manage at any age, and I read it carefully.
What you are describing is not the loss of faith. It is the loss of the sweetness of faith, and our tradition has a name for it and a way through it.
You said it yourself with real precision: you believe, and you wish it were not true.
That is no doubt, and I will not treat it as doubt. It is a heart under contraction (qabd), and no one has taken this road seriously without passing through it.
Your Condition Has a Name, and the Masters Wrote About It
Imam Qushayri (Allah have mercy on him) described the kind of contraction whose cause the person cannot even identify: “There can be a contraction whose cause is unclear to the one it comes upon; he finds contraction in his heart and does not know what has brought it on or what has caused it.
The way of the one in this contraction is to surrender until that time passes … and when he surrenders to the ruling of the moment, it soon lifts.” [al-Qushayri, al-Risala al-Qushayriyya]
Read what he does not say. He does not say you have been cast out. He does not say the feeling is your verdict.
He says the state came upon you without your choosing, it will leave without your forcing, and the harder you fight it, the longer it stays. Your heart is in a season.
You Are Right That Supplication and Remembrance Are Not the Whole Answer
Everyone has told you the answer is supplication (du’a) and remembrance (dhikr), and you wrote that you feel it is much more than that.
You are right, and I would rather agree with you than repeat something that has already failed to reach you.
Supplication and remembrance are medicine, and medicine works inside a regimen: the right dose, at a time you can keep, with rest and food, and someone who checks on you. Handed over as a slogan, they stop being medicine and become one more thing you are failing at.
That is what happened to you, and it is not your fault.
You Are Carrying a Weight Nobody Asked You to Carry
You wrote that the thought of living like this your whole life makes it worse. Of course it does.
You are sixteen, and you have picked up every obligation of an entire adult lifetime and tried to carry all of it at once, today, in one armful. Nobody is asked to do that.
Allah Most High says: “Allah does not tax any soul but what it can bear.” [Quran 2:286; Keller, The Quran Beheld]
The Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and give him peace) said: “Indeed this religion is ease. No one presses hard against this religion without it overcoming him. So be straight, draw near, and take glad tidings.” [Mishkat al-Masabih]
What you feel as suffocation is the feeling of pressing hard. It is the signal to loosen your grip.
Shaykh Mustafa al-Arusi (Allah have mercy on him) cast the soul in an image you will recognize: “Struggle against its whims with gentleness, little by little, for if it is loaded with heavy burdens it bolts, and if it is treated gently in the carrying and the journey it arrives.” [al-Arusi, Nataʾij al-Afkar al-Qudsiyya]
You have been loading the animal. It has stopped walking. Start taking things off it.
One Small Deed, and One Real Person
Pick a single deed and keep it, and let everything else be whatever it is for now.
Ten or fifteen minutes, at a fixed time, on the good days and the flat days alike. The Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and give him peace) said: “The most beloved of deeds to Allah is the most constant of them, even if little.” [Mishkat al-Masabih]
Fifteen honest minutes held every day will do more for you than an exhausted campaign to become again the girl you used to be. She is not who you are being asked to be. You are.
Then find one real human being. A teacher, an older sister in faith you trust, a mentor you can say every word of this to out loud, near you in Morocco or through a course of study you can reach from home.
Imam Qushayri quoted his own teacher Abu Ali al-Daqqaq (Allah have mercy on him): “A tree that grows up by itself with no one to plant it puts out leaves, but bears no fruit.” [al-Qushayri, al-Risala al-Qushayriyya]
Sixteen and alone with this is the heaviest part of what you are carrying, and it is the part you can change this week.
The Sweetness Was Withheld, and It Comes Back
The girl who once believed nothing in this world was worth worrying about did not imagine that. She saw something true, and she is still here, reading this. What went away is the taste, and taste comes back to those who keep eating.
Be as gentle with yourself as Allah is being gentle with you, and go find your teacher. May Allah give you back the sweetness you already know, and an adult life in this religion that feels like the wide-open room it is.
And Allah knows best.
[Shaykh] Faraz Rabbani
Related Answers
[Shaykh Faraz Rabbani, How Do I Revive a Heart That Feels Spiritually Numb?] — Spiritual numbness is the known state of contraction (qabd) rather than a failure, and steady obedience without felt sweetness can be the deeper condition.
[Shaykh Yusuf Weltch, Why Does the Practice of Islam Feel So Burdensome?] — Islam is inherently easy, and the felt burden usually comes from missing knowledge or from excessive caution imposed by others.
[Shaykh Yusuf Weltch, Why Is Islam Difficult and Restrictive?] — The basic requirements of the religion are light, and its limits give the believer structure rather than confinement.
[Ustadha Zaynab Ansari, How Can I Strengthen My Iman When It Hits Rock Bottom?] — Falling faith often tracks outward hardship, and real support matters alongside keeping practice without constant self-monitoring.
Shaykh Faraz Rabbani is a recognized specialist scholar in the Islamic sciences, having studied under leading scholars from around the world. He is the Founder and Executive Director of SeekersGuidance.
Shaykh Faraz stands as a distinguished figure in Islamic scholarship. His journey in seeking knowledge is marked by dedication and depth. He spent ten years studying under some of the most revered scholars of our times. His initial studies took place in Damascus. He then continued in Amman, Jordan.
In Damascus, he was privileged to learn from the late Shaykh Adib al-Kallas. Shaykh Adib al-Kallas was renowned as the foremost theologian of his time. Shaykh Faraz also studied under Shaykh Hassan al-Hindi in Damascus. Shaykh Hassan is recognized as one of the leading Hanafi jurists of our era.
Upon completing his studies, Shaykh Faraz returned to Canada in 2007. His return marked a new chapter in his service to the community. He founded SeekersGuidance. The organization reflects his commitment to spreading Islamic knowledge. It aims to be reliable, relevant, inspiring, and accessible. This mission addresses both online and on-the-ground needs.
Shaykh Faraz is also an accomplished author. His notable work includes “Absolute Essentials of Islam: Faith, Prayer, and the Path of Salvation According to the Hanafi School.” This book, published by White Thread Press in 2004, is a significant contribution to Islamic literature.
His influence extends beyond his immediate community. Since 2011, Shaykh Faraz has been recognized as one of the 500 most influential Muslims. This recognition comes from the Royal Islamic Strategic Studies Center. It underscores his impact on the global Islamic discourse.
Shaykh Faraz Rabbani’s life and work embody a profound commitment to Islamic scholarship. His teachings continue to enlighten and guide seekers of knowledge worldwide.
النصوص · Source-Texts
[أبو القاسم القشيري، الرسالة القشيرية]
«وَقَدْ يَكُونُ قَبْضٌ يُشْكِلُ عَلَى صَاحِبِهِ سَبَبُهُ؛ يَجِدُ فِي قَلْبِهِ قَبْضًا لَا يَدْرِي مَا مُوجِبُهُ وَمَا سَبَبُهُ، فَسَبِيلُ صَاحِبِ هَذَا القَبْضِ التَّسْلِيمُ حَتَّى يَمْضِيَ ذَلِكَ الوَقْتُ … وَإِذَا اسْتَسْلَمَ لِحُكْمِ الوَقْتِ فَعَنْ قَرِيبٍ يَزُولُ»
[مشكاة المصابيح]
«إِنَّ الدِّينَ يُسْرٌ وَلَنْ يُشَادَّ الدِّينَ أَحَدٌ إِلَّا غَلَبَهُ فَسَدِّدُوا وَقَارِبُوا وَأَبْشِرُوا»
[مصطفى العروسي، نتائج الأفكار القدسية]
«وَتُجَاهِدَهَا عَنْ هَوَاهَا بِالرِّفْقِ قَلِيلًا قَلِيلًا؛ فَإِنَّهَا إِنْ حُمِلَتِ الْأَثْقَالُ نَفَرَتْ، وَإِنْ رُفِقَ بِهَا فِي الْحَمْلِ وَالسَّيْرِ وَصَلَتْ»
[مشكاة المصابيح]
«أَحَبُّ الْأَعْمَالِ إِلَى اللهِ أَدْوَمُهَا وَإِنْ قَلَّ»
[أبو القاسم القشيري، الرسالة القشيرية]
«الشَّجَرَةُ إِذَا نَبَتَتْ بِنَفْسِهَا مِنْ غَيْرِ غَارِسٍ تُورِقُ وَلَكِنْ لَا تُثْمِرُ»
