What Does a Woman Get in Paradise for Controlling Her Anger?
Answered by Ustada Shazia Ahmad
Question
I have recently read your article on what women receive for anger control. You seem to mention what a man would get for controlling his anger but not a woman’s reward. If men are allowed to choose any Houri they like if they control their anger, then what will a woman be rewarded with, if at all? Will she be allowed to choose any reward she likes? If a man controls his anger, will he receive more rewards and better rewards than the female who controls her anger? If a woman controls her anger, will she get an equivalent, but different rewards at least? Unfortunately, it feels that Islam is very much male-orientated.
Answer
Thank you for your question. May Allah reward you for being concerned about what Allah has planned for you in Paradise. I advise you not to give it a second thought.
Everything you desire
Allah Most High describes Paradise in the Quran as a place where everyone will have what they desire: “They will have what they want with their lord; And Paradise will be brought near to the righteous, not far off; ˹And it will be said to them,˺ ‘This is what you were promised, for whoever ˹constantly˺ turned ˹to Allah˺ and kept up ˹His commandments˺—who were in awe of the Most Compassionate without seeing ˹Him˺, and have come with a heart turning ˹only to Him˺; Enter it in peace. This is the Day of eternal life!’ There they will have whatever they desire, and with Us is ˹even˺ more. [Quran, 50:31-35]
Words
Don’t fall into thinking that the descriptions of Paradise are all that we are given and that nothing else is included There is much more present that is not described, whether out of modesty, increasing our fondness for it, increasing our hope, or some other wisdom. Don’t let the Devil dissuade you from good works because you perceive that the rewards in Paradise are gender-based. The Devil knows all the tricks in the book, and he is using the oldest ones on you. The rewards are not gender-based, and everyone will be pleased, delighted, overjoyed and given that which one desires most, something that you cannot even comprehend now.
Trust
Please learn to trust in Allah, and remember that this ‘male-oriented’ religion gave women more rights than any other religion ever has, and it has been perfected by our Lord for us. Allah Most High said, “[…] Today I have perfected your faith for you, completed My favour upon you, and chosen Islam as your way. […]” [Quran, 5:3]
And have full confidence in Allah’s promise in the Quran. “Surely ˹for˺ Muslim men and women, believing men and women, devout men and women, truthful men and women, patient men and women, humble men and women, charitable men and women, fasting men and women, men and women who guard their chastity, and men and women who remember Allah often—for ˹all of˺ them Allah has prepared forgiveness and a great reward.” [Quran, 33:35]
Please see below a reader on women’s rank compiled by the SeekersGuidance team.
https://seekersguidance.org/answers/islamic-belief/reader-on-womens-ranks-in-the-hereafter/
May Allah give you the best of this world and the next.
[Ustada] Shazia Ahmad
Checked and approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani
Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria for two years where she studied aqida, fiqh, tajweed, tafsir, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her Masters in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She later moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.
