Can I Delay My Second Pregnancy to Focus on My First Child for Now?


Answered by Ustadha Shazia Ahmad

Question

I am currently 27 weeks pregnant with my first child alhamdulillah. My husband doesn’t want to use contraception after the birth of my first child but I want to delay in having my second child as I want to completely focus on my first baby and give him/ her a proper Islamic upbringing. Also, I have heard that it gets tough to breastfeed if the mother gets pregnant in between as hormones make it difficult for her to breastfeed and I want to breastfeed my baby for two years, in sha Allah. In this case, can I delay my second pregnancy?

Answer

Thank you for your question. May Allah bless you in your first labour and delivery and make this child a coolness for your eyes. Motherhood is a tremendous blessing and I pray that you derive much joy and blessings from it.

Second Pregnancy

What you want is permissible and what your husband wants is also permissible, but consent is required from both parties to use contraception. You should discuss it with him, pray istikhara with him, and decide the best course of action together. I would recommend that you see how you feel about a year after having the baby. Consult your doctor to check on your health. And know that having another child before the first is two years old, will not detract from the first one’s upbringing, but rather would add richness to all of your lives.

Please see these links as well:
The Virtues of Having Children
Is It Selfish To Not Want Children?

Raising Children

More important than timing, please look at these resources to make sure that you are giving your children their rights in all aspects:
Parenting in Islam: How to Raise Righteous Children
Rights of Children in Detail
Raising Children with Deen and Dunya
Keys to Raising Righteous Children: Eight Lessons on Successful Parenting

May Allah give you the best of this world and the next.
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria for two years where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, tafsir, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her Masters in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She later moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.