Is It Homosexuality If My Mentally Disabled Brother Shows Too Much Affection?
Answered by Ustadha Shazia Ahmad
Question
I have taken custody of my brother, who has a severe mental disorder, and taking care of him is very challenging. He is impulsive and dominant and fights everyone verbally. Then he becomes very ill to a point where it’s close to fatal for him. He also makes it hard for the people around him, especially me.
A therapist told me to treat him how you would treat a wife. Take care of him, buy him what he needs, and just overall show affection in a non-sexual way. The therapist also told me to use a sexual tone but don’t talk about anything homosexual or sexual in words. Now that I’ve done that, his behavior towards me is like that of a woman.
Answer
Thank you for your question. This would not be considered homosexuality. If he has calmed down and is showing you affection, it is not sinful from what you describe. I am certain that there is no lust from your side, and you have no reason to think there is lust from his side.
Take, for example, the love and affection that was encouraged by the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace). Abu Hurayra reported that Aqra’ Ibn Habis saw Allah’s Apostle (Allah bless him and give him peace) kissing Hasan. He said: “I have ten children, but I have never kissed any one of them, whereupon Allah’s Messenger (Allah bless him and give him peace) said: ‘He who does not show mercy, no mercy would be shown to him.’” [Muslim]
Please see more details here:
- What Is the Modest Way of Interaction between Opposite-Gender Siblings?
- What Right Do Siblings Have Over Each Other?
- Is Affectionate Physical Contact With Friends From the Sunna?
May Allah give you the best of this world and the next.
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Irshaad Sedick
Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria, for two years, where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, tafsir, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin and completed her Master’s in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan, where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She later moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.
