What Should Guide a Man’s Decision to Take Another Wife?
Answered by Shaykh Irshaad Sedick
Question
Suppose a man wants to remarry, but his first wife strongly opposes it and will seek khul‘, potentially breaking up the family. Should he prioritize preserving his first marriage and home?
Answer
In the Name of Allah, the Most Merciful and Compassionate.
May Allah alleviate our difficulties and guide us to what pleases Him. Amin.
If a man wants to remarry, that is a different question from whether he wants to marry another wife. Suppose a man desires to marry another wife, and there is a strong possibility that his first wife will be so unhappy in the arrangement that she seeks a way out of the marriage, or the arrangement makes life so difficult that continuing one of the two marriages becomes unfeasible for him. In that case, there is no logical reason for him to go through with this arrangement because everyone will end up losing.
Polygyny
While polygyny remains permissible, providing a man fulfills the conditions set upon him by sacred law, it may not always be wise. This can be demonstrated in the events surrounding Ali’s decision to attempt to marry another whilst married to Sayyida Fatima. Allah be pleased with her. The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) did not approve of such an arrangement and made it very clear to ‘Ali that this displeases him, and therefore ‘Ali backed down.
Allah’s Messenger (Allah bless him and give him peace) said:
“Verily, Fatima, the daughter of Muhammad, is a part of me, and I do not approve that she may be put to any trial, and by Allah, the daughter of Allah’s Messenger cannot be combined with the daughter of God’s enemy (as the co-wives) of one person. Thereupon, ‘Ali gave up (the idea of his intended) marriage.” [Muslim]
Based on this and the fact that the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) remained with Sayyida Khadija as his sole wife for the duration of her life, this means that there’s strong precedent for stating that the default is to maintain monogamy for as long as monogamy is the most feasible form of marital relation.
Please consult the following resources:
- Can a Man Marry a Second Wife If He Cannot Fulfil Her Rights?
- Can Someone Have a Second Wife without Informing His First Wife and Children?
- Can a Husband Threaten His Wife with a Second Marriage?
I pray this is of benefit and that Allah guides us all.
And Allah knows best.
[Shaykh] Irshaad Sedick
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani
Shaykh Irshaad Sedick was raised in South Africa in a traditional Muslim family. He graduated from Dar al-Ulum al-Arabiyyah al-Islamiyyah in Strand, Western Cape, under the guidance of the late world-renowned scholar Shaykh Taha Karaan (Allah have mercy on him), where he taught.
Shaykh Irshaad received Ijaza from many luminaries of the Islamic world, including Shaykh Taha Karaan, Shaykh Muhammad Awama, Shaykh Muhammad Hasan Hitu, and Mawlana Abdul Hafeez Makki, among others.
He is the author of the text “The Musnad of Ahmad ibn Hanbal: A Hujjah or not?” He has been the Director of the Discover Islam Centre, and for six years, he has been the Khatib of Masjid Ar-Rashideen, Mowbray, Cape Town.
Shaykh Irshaad has fifteen years of teaching experience at some of the leading Islamic institutes in Cape Town. He is currently building an Islamic podcast, education, and media platform called ‘Isnad Academy’ and has completed his Master’s degree in the study of Islam at the University of Johannesburg. He has a keen interest in healthy Prophetic living and fitness.
