Answered by Sidi Faraz A. Khan
Question: I’m a teenage girl and I have a guy friend of 2 years and I did fall in love with him without meaning to. We talked about marriage in the future but now we are just friends. I don’t have the same feelings for him ever since I turned towards Islam. I know it was wrong of me to become friends with him and to love him, but I’m really trying to become a better Muslim and I tried to end our friendship last year but I couldn’t. I am thinking about it again and I just want assurance that it’s the right thing to do.
Answer: Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullah,
I pray this finds you in the best of health and faith.
Without a doubt, the right thing to do is to completely cut off all ties with him and end the friendship. This will be better for both of you, as adherence to the Sacred Law (shari’a) is the means for all blessing and success in any endeavor, especially marriage.
If he is interested in marrying you, have him go through his family and your family. This way, proper steps can be taken to ensure all etiquette and manners are upheld in the process.
In terms of your heart, turn it to Allah and the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him). Right now is a special time, in which we commemorate his blessed birth and express our gratitude to Allah for sending him to us for our guidance and salvation. The Prophet Muhammad is the very best of creation, and he is the only means to draw near to Allah.
Read about the Prophet’s life, character, and special traits. Allah will fill your heart with love for him, and adherence to the Shari’a will become easy, to the extent that not adhering to it will become heavy and difficult.
The more we fill our hearts with love of the Prophet, the less room in our hearts for the haram.
May Allah continuously send blessings and peace upon him, his family and folk, and all followers until the Last Day. Amin.
Some Useful Links
For a detailed examination of the life and character of the Prophet Muhammad, I would highly recommend the book “Muhammad: His Life Based on the Earliest Sources” by Martin Lings.
And for a more summarized presentation of his exalted character, I would recommend the following article:
Why Is the Prophet’s Character Described as Being Tremendous? – Faraz Rabbani
And Allah alone gives success.
Faraz A. Khan
Checked & Approved by Faraz Rabbani