Is It Permissible for a Father to Be Away from His Children Without Reason?

Answered by Shaykh Abdul-Rahim Reasat

Question

Is it permissible for a father to be away from his children for long periods without a valid reason?

Answer

I pray you are well.

No, it is not permissible for a father to be absent from his children for extended periods without a valid and genuine reason.

Two Situations to Distinguish

There are two common scenarios in which a father may be away from his children:

One: When the Father Is Prevented From Seeing His Children

If someone is deliberately preventing a father from seeing his children, this is a grave injustice. Children need their father in their lives. Preventing that relationship harm:

• The children emotionally and developmentally,
• The father’s bond with his children, and
• Ultimately, the relationship of the one causing the separation with those children.

When children grow older and understand what happened, resentment is likely to arise toward whoever deprived them of that relationship. Such actions should be feared and avoided.

Two: When the Father Neglects His Children

If the absence is due to neglect, whether because of excessive work, personal pursuits, social life, or other distractions, it is a failure of responsibility.

Parenthood requires sacrifice. Once a person becomes a parent, life is no longer centered solely around personal plans, comfort, or ambitions. Time, convenience, and even long-held goals must sometimes be set aside for the sake of one’s children.

The Father’s Responsibility

Allah Most High decrees children as a blessing, but also as a trust. A father will be asked about the well-being of his children:

• Did he spend time with them?
• Did he show love and affection?
• Did he nurture their emotional, moral, and spiritual growth?

Children do not primarily remember how much money was earned for them. What shapes them is presence, care, attention, and affection. Without this, they may be emotionally and morally stunted, and the consequences can last a lifetime.

Religious Activities and Absence

Even an absence justified by religious activities must be approached with caution. Acts of devotion or outreach do not excuse neglecting one’s family. Children do not raise themselves. While Allah Most High provides sustenance, children require tarbiya: upbringing, love, guidance, and education.

Responsibility toward one’s wife and children takes precedence. Leaving them for long periods without proper care and attention may result in accountability before Allah.

A Final Reminder

Children may restrict personal freedom, convenience, or lifestyle—but this is part of the responsibility Allah has entrusted to parents. Appreciating the blessing of children means fulfilling their rights.

If a father has been neglectful, the time to act is now. Reconnecting, being present, and investing time and care can still make a profound difference.

Related

• Keys to Raising Righteous Children: Eight Lessons on Successful Parenting
• Parenting in Islam: How to Raise Righteous Children

And Allah knows best.
[Shaykh] Abdul-Rahim

Shaykh Abdul-Rahim Reasat began studying Arabic Grammar and Morphology whilst studying for a degree in English and History. After graduating, He traveled to Damascus and studied Arabic, Hanafi Fiqh, Usul al-Fiqh, Theology, and Logic with Shaykh Adnan Darwish, Shaykh ‘Abd al-Rahman Arjan al-Binsawi, Shaykh Husayn Darwish, Shaykh Muhammad Darwish, the late Shaykh Rashad Shams, and others. He then moved to Amman to continue his studies in those fields, as well as in Tafsir, Quranic Sciences, Hadith Methodology and Commentary, Prophetic Biography, Prophetic Perfections and Traits, Rhetoric, Arabic Literature, and Tajwid. His teachers include Shaykh Ali Hani, Dr. Hamza al-Bakri, Dr Salah Abu al-Hajj, Dr Mansur Abu Zina, Shaykh Ahmad Hasanat, Shaykh Ahmad Jammal, and others.