Question: I was wondering is it possible for me a gay man to marry a woman to fulfill my duties as a Muslim, especially if I am confident I will treat her well. Or is this deception and unfair to her. In this case, what is expected, am I to remain single? Are there any alternatives? Is the opinion the same for bisexual men?
It is permitted for you to marry a woman as long as you are able to fulfill all her rights – religious, physical, emotional, and material.
It will not be considered deception for you to do so even if you say you are a gay man. Rather, it is like any other person who may suffer from certain inclinations and challenges that potentially impact a relationship. You may be upfront about these challenges with your potential spouse so that you can address them together. This is for you to decide in light of your circumstances.
In the end, you also need to be honest with yourself about the difficulties you might face and your ability to address them, especially when it will impact the rights of another person. I am unable to give much advice on how you can practically address your inclinations in the context of marriage. I would advise seeking out Muslim professionals and counselors in this regard.
Given the considerations in such cases, please consult reliable local scholars about the specifics of the situation. Jazakum Allah khayr.
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani
Ustadh Salman Younas was born and raised in New York and graduated from Stony Brook University with a degree in Political Science and Religious Studies. After studying the Islamic sciences online and with local scholars in New York, Ustadh Salman moved to Amman. There he studies Islamic law, legal methodology, belief, hadith methodology, logic, Arabic, and tafsir. Ustadh Salman’s personal interests include research into the fields of law/legal methodology, hadith, theology, as well as political theory, government, media, and ethics. He is also an avid traveler and book collector. He currently resides in Amman with his wife.