Answered by Ustadha Shazia Ahmad
I was in an online hifz (Quran memorization) school and towards the end of my hifz, I would sometimes cheat by looking at a mushaf while reading to the teacher, which I could easily do as the school was online.
Now, I regret this. I completed my hifz, but I was worried whether I had actually completed it because of the cheating. I might have memorized those parts later during revisions.
I have some waswasa issues as well, but I’m not sure if that’s relevant. One of my aunts gave me some money as a gift for the hifz, is it halal for me to use? Is it obligatory for me to immediately memorize the parts which I had cheated on? Do I have to confess what I did? Can you find me a legal ruling that is easy to follow?
Thank you for your question. May Allah reward you eternally and make your memorization a means of the continuation of Islam on this Earth.
You should categorically ignore all of these misgivings. You don’t need to confess anything. Don’t feel overwhelmed by your guilt, or despair, but rather, when your fear arises, perform a good deed. The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) told us, “Have taqwa (fear) of Allah wherever you may be, and follow up a bad deed with a good deed which will wipe it out, and behave well towards the people.” [Tirmidhi]
Please see more details here:
How Should I Deal with Waswasa (Misgivings)?
How Can I Overcome Excessive Waswasa (Misgivings)?
Simply repent for cheating. Allah is the Most Merciful of the merciful and He is prepared to forgive all sins except associating partners with Him. Allah Most High has told us in His book, “Say, ˹O Prophet, that Allah says,˺ “O My servants who have exceeded the limits against their souls! Do not lose hope in Allah’s mercy, for Allah certainly forgives all sins. He is indeed the All-Forgiving, Most Merciful.” [Quran, 39:53]
Please see this link as well:
I Lied About Memorizing the Quran: What Should I Do?
Is There a Kaffara For Cheating On an Exam?
Your money is a gift, it is halal to use, no matter what you did in your class. Make dua for your aunt, be grateful to have people in your life who appreciate your efforts and show their love, and don’t give it a second thought.
My advice to you is to review your memorization of the Quran, at your own pace and ease, perhaps with a teacher, and intend to solidify it for the sake of Allah and preserving His book. You have been given a tremendous gift, a gift that many have not been given and you must show gratitude that you carry it in your heart. Intend to carry out the meanings of the Quran, and intend to polish and refine your character over time.
May Allah give you the best of this world and the next.
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani
Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria for two years where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, tafsir, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her Masters in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She later moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.