Answered by Shaykh Abdurragmaan Khan

Question: Assalam alaykum,

The first time I divorced my wife I did it over the phone after asking her if there was any chance for us. She said no and I told her that I give you 1 divorce.

The circumstances for the 2nd divorce were this:

We were talking in front of the children about something. She said it is over and I began to feel anxious and upset. In a knee-jerk reaction I told her that I give her 1 divorce.

How many divorces are valid?

Answer: Wa alaykum al-Salam

May Allah bless you.

Both divorces seems to be valid. If you would like to reconcile with your wife, you may do so. If she is still in ‘iddah, then by taking her back (raj’ah); if her ‘iddah expired then by remarriage.

Also, the validity of the second divorce is based on the assumption that you correctly made raj’ah after the first divorce or remarried her.

As for your state of mind during the second divorce, this would be the state of men in most instances of divorce. Our jurists would only make an exception and not consider the divorce valid, if it could medically be established that you reached such a state of anger that you were no longer in control of your actions, similar to the insane.

And Allah knows best
[Shaykh] Abdurragmaan Khan

Shaykh Abdurragmaan
received ijazah ’ammah from various luminaries, including but not restricted to: Habib Umar ibn Hafiz—a personality who affected him greatly and who has changed his relationship with Allah, Maulana Yusuf Karaan—the former Mufti of Cape Town; Habib ‘Ali al-Mashhur—the current Mufti of Tarim; Habib ‘Umar al-Jaylani—the Shafi‘i Mufti of Makkah; Sayyid Ahmad bin Abi Bakr al-Hibshi; Habib Kadhim as-Saqqaf; Shaykh Mahmud Sa’id Mamduh; Maulana Abdul Hafiz al-Makki; Shaykh Ala ad-Din al-Afghani; Maulana Fazlur Rahman al-Azami and Shaykh Yahya al-Gawthani amongst others.

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