Answered by Ustadha Shazia Ahmad
My husband says our first child should be named by his mother (as she has named all firstborns). Naturally, as a mother, I would like to name our child. He says he would like to give his mother the right to name the child. Is this permitted? Unfortunately, this is causing discord and upset between us.
I empathize with the frustration you are feeling over this. It can be challenging to carry a child and have your wishes ignored about naming the child.
Your husband does have the right to name the child as he is the head of the family. As such, he also has the right to ask his mother to name the child. I find it highly loving, respectful, and high character for him to please his mother like this. Put yourself in her shoes and imagine how you would feel if your son gave you this honor.
You should find a compromise that you both can agree on. I had a friend who also couldn’t agree with her husband on a name, and they did the following: They compiled a list of 5 names that they both liked, and then they agreed to take it to an elder third person and asked them to pick one. Perhaps you can try this?
Rest assured that as long as the child has a good name and meaning, he will take most of his upbringing from you, his mother. So try not to harp on the name and instead focus on learning the children’s rights and the parent’s responsibilities toward them.
May Allah bless your child and make him the coolness of your eyes.
The Powerful Dua of a Parent
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani
Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria for two years where she studied aqida, fiqh, tajweed, tafsir, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her Masters in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She later moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.