What Should I Do if My Husband Is Refusing To Have Children?
Answer:
Thank you for your question. It truly is a crime that he prevents you from having children as it is one of the primary purposes of marriage. This should have been discussed optimally before marriage.
Communication
Your husband obviously has a strong reason for not wanting to have children, and he should be transparent about it. Try to communicate with him openly about why this is so important to you, and try to at least come up with a plan. You may consider speaking together with a counselor, elder, or imam that you both trust and respect to advise you.
Exhaust All Measures
If he feels that your health does not permit it, try to involve a doctor or psychologist to assess the situation. A professional opinion always helps. Make a habit to employ istikhara to make such decisions, and give in regular charity to facilitate this matter. Also, see if your husband will agree to the adoption, as there are many couples out there who have adopted, hence multiplying their reward, by the grace of Allah.
If absolute worst comes to worst, then you have valid grounds for divorce, but there is much uncertainty in this. It might not even make your life happier, so proceed with caution. See the following link for more information:
https://seekersguidance.org/answers/hanafi-fiqh/my-husband-doesnt-want-to-have-kids-what-can-i-do/
Given the considerations in such cases, please consult reliable local scholars about the specifics of the situation. Jazakum Allah khayr.
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani
Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria for two years where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, tafseer, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her Masters in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She recently moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.
