Is It Correct to Start the Idda After Purity from Menstruation Following Intimacy Before Talaq?


Answered by Mawlana Ilyas Patel

Question

Is it correct to start the idda period after becoming pure from the menstruation that followed intimacy before talaq?
Does an apology without explicitly stating “I want you back” or flirting and expressing desire constitute ruju by speech or actions?

Answer

In the Name of Allah, the Most Merciful and Compassionate

Yes, your waiting period (idda) will begin when your next menstrual cycle starts. An apology is not enough, nor is flirting. However, you may discuss whether he intends to remain married.

Revoking a Divorce

Jurists have mentioned two ways of revoking a divorce (ruju): speech and action. Speech is better than action.

To revoke by speech, the husband can say, “I have taken you back” or “I have retained you.” This can be affected by whether the wife is in front of him or not; however, where the wife is not present, it is best to have two witnesses.

Jurists have established that for revocation to be valid through actions, there must be an expression of lust or desire from either the husband or the wife. If there is no desire present, the revocation does not take effect. Therefore, actions such as touching the wife, engaging in intercourse, kissing her, or touching her face, forehead, and lips—with or without cloth intervening where the warmth of the body can be felt with desire—will constitute a valid revocation.

If the ‘idda (waiting period) ends and the husband has not revoked a revocable divorce, the couple will need to enter into a new marriage contract (nikah) with a new mahr (dowry) payment for the wife. This is applicable only if the husband has not already issued three divorces. [Ibn ’Abidin, Radd al-Muhtar]

I would like you to go through the valuable answers and links below. In sha Allah, you will receive guidance and direction.

What Are the Rulings of ʿIdda (Waiting Period)?
What Are the Rulings of the Waiting Period (‘Idda)?

I pray this helps answer your question.

[Mawlana] Ilyas Patel
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Abdul-Rahim Reasat 

Mawlana Ilyas Patel has received traditional education in various countries. He started his schooling in the UK and completed his hifz of the Quran in India. After that, he joined an Islamic seminary in the UK, where he studied secular and Aalimiyya sciences. Later, he traveled to Karachi, Pakistan, and other Middle Eastern countries to further his education. Mawlana has served as an Imam in the Republic of Ireland for several years and taught the Quran and other Islamic sciences to both children and adults. He also worked as a teacher and librarian at a local Islamic seminary in the UK for 12 years. Presently, he lives in the UK with his wife and is interested in books and gardening.