Are My Non-Muslim Parents Affected by Islamic Rulings on Affectionate Customs?

Answered by Shaykh Yusuf Weltch

Question

My parents are non-Muslim, and they don’t know I’ve fully converted. I saw a mufti say that a father kissing his daughter on the lips invalidates his marriage. My dad has done this since I was a child as a normal sign of affection.

Do such Islamic rules apply to non-Muslim parents? I’m worried about what it means for my family. If they ever accept Islam, I’ll let them know and stop this practice.

Answer

In the Name of Allah, the Most Merciful and Compassionate.

Islamic rules do not apply to non-muslims in this regard. Even if it did, for a man to kiss his daughter on the mouth, although it’s prohibitively disliked, it does not invalidate the marriage unless it is with actual lust and sexual desire, which is highly unlikely in the scenario you mentioned above. [Ibn ‘Abidin, Radd al-Muhtar]

The definition of desire, in this legal context, is for the man to begin to have an erection or for his erection to increase by way of that action or its presence during that action. [Ibid.]

Hope this helps
Allah knows best
[Shaykh] Yusuf Weltch
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Shaykh Yusuf Weltch is a teacher of Arabic, Islamic law, and spirituality. After accepting Islam in 2008, he went on to study at Darul Uloom Seminary in New York and completed his studies at Darul Mustafa in Tarim, Yemen.

There, he completed the memorization of the Quran and his study of Islamic Sciences. Throughout his years of study, he was blessed to learn from many great scholars: Habib Umar bin Hafiz, Habib Kazhim al-Saqqaf, Shaykh ‘Umar bin Husayn al-Khatib, and others.

Upon returning, he joined the SeekersGuidance faculty in the summer of 2019.