How Can I Resolve With My Fiance Which City We Should Live In?
Answered by Ustadha Shazia Ahmad
Question:
I live in the east of London and a girl I have met, with parental permission, sees a bright future with me, but she lives in the north of England. I do not want to move out, and neither does she, we have discussed meeting halfway, but I am wondering if there is any Islamic guidance on this matter?
Answer:
Assalamu alaykum,
Thank you for your question. Congratulations on finding a suitable girl, and I pray that you have success and happiness with her and find a good compromise. I commend your wisdom in discussing this issue beforehand.
Islam
Islamically doesn’t particularly give a ruling on this point except that a woman should follow her husband and live, ultimately, where he deems fit. In addition to this, my teacher reminded me that the classical Shafi’i texts appear to agree that it is within the husband’s rights “to take her with him when he travels.” [Misri, ‘Umda Al-Salik]
Compromise
However, in order to facilitate a happy marriage, being in a place that makes both of you comfortable is a bonus and another factor that will reduce complications. My advice to you is to choose a place that is good for your religion, whether through its programs, mosques, or pious people that live there.
Furthermore, including a broad clause about where to live in your written marriage contract can prove useful. Perhaps you can agree to spend some time in her area and some in your area before you settle on it. Please consider taking a course on marriage to learn your obligations and rights and to learn about the spirit of an Islamic Marriage.
https://academy.seekersguidance.org/enrol/index.php?id=282
May Allah bless your family and give you the best of this world and the next.
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani
Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria, for two years, where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, tafseer, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her master’s in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan, where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She recently moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.
