What Are the Obligations of a Woman Toward Her Ex-Husband Who Abducted Their Children?

What Are the Obligations of a Woman Toward Her Ex-Husband Who Abducted Their Children?


What are the rights and responsibilities for a remarried woman toward her former husband that was physically abusive and abducted their children? The children, when abducted, were only 5 and 4 years old, and she hasn’t seen them nor was given a chance to speak to them in over ten years. What are the duties of children who grow up to find out that their father abducted them from their mother?


Assalamu alaykum,

Thank you for your question. I am so sorry for the painful events in your life, and I pray that you have a chance to be with your children again in a healthy and happy way for everyone.


You don’t have any obligations toward your ex-husband, but you do have a right to see your children. If you were prevented from doing this, without just cause, then he will face a great accounting for this on the Day of Judgment. I don’t know the details of your situation, but if the circumstances allow it, you should never stop fighting to speak to them. After they are 18 years old, they have a right to get in touch with you, legally. However, if they don’t know about you, or can’t remember, or if they have been brainwashed, nothing will be easy. Although they are obliged to be good to you, they need to know you first! How can they begin to fulfill their duties when they are victims or prevented?

Turn to Allah

Turn to Allah in this madness and chaos and know that He will help you through this. Pray fervently for their religion and well-being and make your entire existence for Him. Allah sends to the believers only what they can endure, and He is with those who persevere and are patient. Supplicate to Allah to grant you relief and supplicate to Him in the depth of the night in your grief and pain. Work on yourself in the meanwhile, acquire beneficial knowledge, apply it, and surround yourself with pious people who support and love you.

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May Allah give you the best of this world and the next.
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad

Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria, for two years, where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, tafseer, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her master’s in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan, where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She recently moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.